Featured:
  • A Very Purr-sonable Cat
    (1,813 thumbs up)
  • May Theme Of The Month: Movie Mayhem!

    Please Consult The Chameleon Circuit

    | Melbourne, Australia | Geeks Rule, Top

    (We’re a science fiction specialty bookstore. We also have a few other odds’n’ends around the store from series that do well, including several bits of Doctor Who merchandise.)

    Me: “Can I help you today, sir?”

    Customer: “All of your Doctor Who stuff is bootlegged!”

    Me: “I assure you it’s not, sir. As you can see, it has the BBC logo on it.”

    Customer: “They can print anything in China. This TARDIS is a total knock off!”

    Me: “Possibly, but we source our merchandise from reputable distributors located in the US & UK. We’re using the same suppliers that the [National Broadcaster] store uses for its Doctor Who merchandise.”

    Customer: “Bulls***! This is all fake! And you know how I can tell? Phoneboxes are RED!”

    The Great District of Confusion

    , | Bakersfield, CA | Geography, School

    (I am a student working in the on campus bookstore. A customer comes in and approaches me.)

    Me: “Hi, can I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes, I need a map of Washington.”

    Me: “Washington state or Washington, D.C.?”

    Customer: “What do you mean?”

    Me: “Do you need a map for Washington state or Washington, D.C.?”

    Customer: *confused* “What’s the difference, and what do you mean by D.C.?”

    Me: “Well, one is a state above Oregon on the West coast, and the other—Washington, D.C.—is an area on the east coast. ‘D.C.’ stands for District of Columbia.”

    Customer: “No, not in Colombia! In America!”

    Me: “Ma’am, Washington, D.C. is in America. That is what it is called.”

    Customer: “I don’t think you know what you’re talking about. I just need a map of Washington for my political science class.”

    Me: “Ah, then I’ll get you a map of Washington, D.C.”

    Customer: “I think you’re wrong. I am going to tell my professor you guys are giving out maps of Colombia!” *walks away looking very annoyed*

    Related:
    Make Benefit Glorious Guestlogisticstan
    The Great State Of Confusion, Part 2
    The Great State Of Confusion
    The Great State Of Ignorance

    The Gift That Keeps On Grouping

    | Michigan, USA | Uncategorized

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like to return this item, I can’t give it as a gift .”

    (He hands me a copy of Pygmalion.)

    Me: “That shouldn’t be a problem. Is there anything wrong with it?”

    Customer: “Turns out it’s a play. They wont be able to read it.”

    Me: “Oh, they don’t like plays?”

    Customer: “No, they can’t read it because there aren’t enough people to read the parts!”

    Me: “Might I suggest that they just read it like a regular book?”

    Customer: *looks at me like I’m crazy*

    Reading Is Addictive

    | Colorado, USA | Family & Kids

    (Two kids in the 10 to 12-year old range come to the register with 3 different marijuana-themed magazines.)

    Me: “Um, I don’t think I can sell you those.”

    Kids: “But our mom says it’s okay.”

    Me: “Is she even in the store?”

    (Their mother comes over a few minutes later and buys the magazines.)

    Mother: “As long as they’re reading, right?”

    Related:
    Reading Is Infectious

    The True Burden Of Society

    | North Carolina, USA | Uncategorized

    (I am working customer service at a well-known bookstore, and have just completed filling an order for an elderly woman over the phone.)

    Me: “Well, ma’am, that takes care of that order. It’ll be here in a week and we’ll call you once it’s received.”

    Customer: “Oh, well, thank you very much. You’ve been a real help.”

    Me: “It’s no problem, ma’am. You have a good d–”

    Customer: “How dare you.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am?”

    Customer: “How dare you say it was nothing to help me! As if helping me means nothing!”

    Me: *dumbfounded and a bit shocked*

    (At this point, the customer launches into a full-blown tirade against “my generation” and “young workers” who have “no respect for their elders.”)

    Customer: “And it’s just, you know, despicable how they can let you get away with something like this! I think that you all should–”

    Me: “Ma’am?”

    Customer: “And I just think that–”

    Me: “Ma’am.”

    Customer: “What?!”

    Me: “Have a pleasant day, ma’am.” *hangs up*

    Page 33/80First...3132333435...Last