Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • De-Engineering Stereotypes
    (1,836 thumbs up)
  • September Theme Of The Month: Return Of The Geeks!
    Submit your story today!

    You’re Not In Kansas Anymore

    , | San Antonio, TX, USA | Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Tourists/Travel

    (I work as a supervisor taking calls. In my center, I have the highest authority on the phones. My name is common in Spain, Greece, and India.)

    Coworker: “I don’t know what this customer wants. She requested a supervisor, got me, and said I wasn’t good enough to handle the problem.”

    Me: “Okay, send her through.” *transfers* “Hello, ma’am. My name is [My Name]. I’m the supervisor on duty, and would like to know how I can help.”

    Customer: “I want to talk to your supervisor.”

    Me: “I apologize. I’m unable to transfer you to anyone else. I am the top tier of support. How may I help you?”

    Customer: “I don’t want to talk to you. I want to talk to someone in the United States.”

    Me: “We only have call centers in the continental US. I’m located in Texas, and am waiting to know how I can assist with what you were calling about.”

    Customer: “Don’t lie to me. I am from India. You sound like me. You’re from India and the law says if I ask to speak with someone in the US that you have to transfer me.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I have never heard of such a law. I’m physically unable to transfer you to anyone else, and have been patiently waiting to know how to assist you. Please let me help you with the reason you called, or I will have to end this call.”

    Customer: “Transfer me to who I was speaking with before.”

    Me: “Ma’am, as I said before, I can not transfer you anywhere else. Now, either tell me what I can do to help, or you can call back if you no longer wish to speak with me, as I can’t transfer you. Fair warning, though. We currently have a 30 minute hold time.”

    Customer: “I would like to know what time I leave tomorrow.”

    Me: “You depart at 0430, and land at 0625. What is your next request?”

    Customer: “That was all.” *click*

    (Exhausted with dealing with the caller, I look over to the only other person who has the same level of authority that I do.)

    Colleague: “Aren’t you the one who everyone always confuses with the recorded message because you have such a generic sounding accent?”

    Dead On Arrival

    | San Jose, CA, USA | Tourists/Travel, Transportation, Wild & Unruly

    (My husband and I are flying on a late Friday evening flight on a major air carrier and have just pushed back from the gate when the plane stops. We sit for less than five minutes when the pilot comes on the intercom and announces that we would be delayed slightly.)

    Pilot: “I thought I saw something odd with one of our engines as we started to pull out. It’s probably nothing, but we want to check it to make sure. It will be just a few minutes, folks.”

    (At this point, the passenger behind us, who is dressed in a business suit, starts making comments.)

    Passenger: “I hate this f****** airline! I’ve been late twice in the past few months, and they can’t ever get their act together. Now we’re going to be late again. They need to get this f****** show on the road!”

    (Less than ten minutes go by, with the passenger behind us swearing and commenting loudly and rudely to the man next to him, as well as calling a couple of people on his cell phone and roundly abusing the airline in very foul-mouthed language. Then the pilot comes on the com again.)

    Pilot: “Folks, we’re spraying gas from our number two engine, and I’ve called the mechanic to come look at it and see if it’s serious, or is something that can be fixed. I’m afraid there will be about a half hour delay while we determine what’s going on with the engine.”

    (At this point, the obnoxious passenger behind us calls one of the flight attendants over and starts ranting.)

    Passenger: “Your f****** airline is such a piece of s***! I’ve been working hard for two days and I need to get home to my wife, and now this f****** flight is delayed! My time is valuable, you know!”

    Attendant: “I’m very sorry, sir. We prefer to be safe, and hopefully it will be something that is easy to fix.”

    Passenger: “Yeah, always excuses! You people are such a bunch of f***-ups. My wife is going to be livid when she finds out we’re delayed! Get that f****** mechanic out there now, and get this plane moving! That f****** pilot is making me late! I’ve got places to be!”

    Attendant: “Everyone on this plane has somewhere to be, sir. I daresay that the pilot would like nothing better than to be done with this flight and getting to bed. I and the rest of the crew would like to be getting through with this flight and going off to bed, as well. I’m going to be late going home to my own family.”

    Passenger: “I’m an important businessman, and I need to get home! Your screw-up is what’s the problem, and I’m going to file a complaint against this f****** airline! Who cares about you, anyway? You’re just a bunch of pathetic losers who work for a f***-up airline. I’m never going to fly with your f****** airline again, because I won’t get in until after midnight at this rate! Thanks for screwing up the start of my weekend, a**hole! You can take your f****** airline and shove it!”

    (My husband, at this point, has had enough, and stands up to glower down at the obnoxious businessman. I’ve rarely seen him angry, but when he finally reaches that point, he can be intimidating.)

    Husband: “Look, this airplane has a mechanical problem, and the crew are doing everything they can to resolve it. Stop acting like an a-hole to the attendant, because he’s in the same boat we all are. And I’m SICK of listening to you whine and swear about how you’re going to be late. Fine, we’re all going to be late. I would rather be late landing in our destination than end up DEAD wherever we land when the PLANE FALLS OUT OF THE SKY when the ENGINE SELF-DESTRUCTS! GOT IT? Good!”

    (The attendant smiled and a couple other passengers flashed a thumbs-up at my husband. The obnoxious passenger got very quiet from there on out. The engine turned out to have a serious problem. We exited the plane shortly after the mechanic took a look at the engine, and the airline found us another aircraft. We were several hours late, but we didn’t hear from the obnoxious guy again, because my husband was right. Better to arrive in the middle of the night than not arrive at all!)

    Wishes He Could Back Up The Conversation

    , | Denver, CO, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I work in our airline’s IT dept. One of our guys is finishing his shift and passes a task on to me to delete a user’s Windows profile when the user is not busy. I noticed this user has an assigned network drive with a shortcut to it on his desktop so I figure he knows how to use it.)

    Me: “So, I’m gonna remove your profile from the registry and then delete your profile folder. This will delete everything you have. Do you have all of your important documents backed up?”

    User: “Yeah, it’s all good. Go ahead and delete it.”

    Me: “Okay.”

    (I delete his profile’s registry entry and then go to delete his folder. I notice he has about 3GB of data as it builds its list to delete.)

    Me: “It seems you have three gigs of data in your profile. Just want to make sure everything that you need is backed up, because it will all be gone.”

    User: “Yeah. It’s good, man. Do what you gotta do.”

    Me: “Okay.”

    (I let the delete finish and then restart the computer.)

    User: “So, the files that were on my desktop, where do I go to get those back?”

    Me: “The files on your desktop? You told me you backed everything up, so they have been deleted.”

    User: “I’m not very savvy with computers. I don’t know what ‘backup’ means.”

    Mile High Blood Pressure

    | England, UK | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Top, Tourists/Travel, Transportation

    (I work for a very successful low-budget airline. On this particular day, there is an air traffic control strike, which has caused an hour delay to the flight. One passenger has been kicking off at everything since he has got on board. He’s also traveling with his kids. We are in the air, doing the food service. We have run out of a popular sandwich that he wanted four of.)

    Passenger: “This is f****** ridiculous! I’ve paid for a f****** sandwich!”

    Colleague: “I’m terribly sorry about that, sir. Is there a different sandwich I could get you, or would you like a refund?”

    Passenger: “I don’t like any off the other f****** sandwiches. I wanted a [sandwich] and you don’t have it, so you can f*** off!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Unfortunately, we can’t guarantee availability. Here’s your money back for the sandwich. Can I get you anything else?”

    Passenger: “You can f*** off, f****** mugging me off! I’ve just been charged five f****** pounds for a [soft drink]!”

    (The sandwiches come as part of a deal where if you buy a soft drink, you get a free packet of crisps. As the sandwiches had been put through our machine already, the customer in question is actually up on the deal, having still gotten the free items.)

    Colleague: “If I can just take you through your receipt, sir, you’ll see you are actually up on the deal…”

    Passenger: “F*** you! You’re s***, and [Airline] is s***! F*** off, you f****** c***, and get back to your poxy little job!”

    (At this point my colleague’s eyes are watering. I go to get a manager. When we get back, despite having moved the trolley to serve the rest of the cabin, the passenger is still kicking off.)

    Manager: “No! You do not talk like that to my crew, and you do not swear on board this aircraft. There are kids on board!”

    Passenger: “They’re my f****** kids, so f*** off!”

    Manager: “There are other kids around you. Do not swear in front of them, and don’t swear at us, sir. We are trying to help you.”

    (At this point, I’ve spoken to the captain to explain what’s going on. We arrange to have the police meet the aircraft, not to have him arrested, but to speak to him and make him realise that his behaviour is not acceptable. The captain then does a PA to say that abuse against staff will not be tolerated. Other passengers are getting involved at this point, backing us up, but the passenger continues to shout and swear…)

    Passenger: “F***** discrimination, that’s what it is! If I ran a business like this, it would f****** go under!”

    (He continues until we land. As everyone is disembarking, the captain comes out and approaches the passenger…)

    Captain: “Mr. [Name]? Nice to meet you. I have someone I’d like to introduce you to…”

    (He passed him to the biggest police officer I have ever seen. The passenger went white as he got off the plane. The best bit? The police ran a check on his name and it turned out he was a wanted man, and he ended up being arrested! If he’d just kept his mouth shut, then he wouldn’t have been arrested!)

    Non-Flight Risk

    | Canada | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Hotels & Lodging, Top, Tourists/Travel, Transportation

    (A passenger takes a flight from British Columbia to Newfoundland with one connection in between in Calgary. With roughly an hour to make the connection, she should have an easy time, especially since all flights are on time, and her gates are right across the room from each other. However, she misses her connecting flight. Our airline, at no additional fee, moves her to the next available flight in six hours. Within an hour or so, however, she calls our call center.)

    Passenger: “I’d like to make a complaint!”

    Agent: “Oh? I’m sorry to hear that. How can I assist you?”

    Passenger: “I’m calling because your airline made me miss my connecting flight, and would not provide me a hotel for the night.”

    Agent: “Oh, wow. I’m terribly sorry to hear that. What is your reservation code? I’ll see if I can find out if there is something we can do.”

    (The agent reviews the reservation, and sees that the passenger has been re-accommodated to a new flight, and has been given a meal voucher for within the airport.)

    Agent: “With all due respect, ma’am, it seems that your flight into Calgary was actually early, and you had just over an hour to connect to your connecting flight. It even shows that the agent at the gate called your name a few times. I’m not sure how we caused you to miss your flight.”

    Passenger: “It was all your fault! And I want you guys to pay for my hotel for the night!”

    Agent: “Again, ma’am, I apologize for—”

    Passenger: “It was all the pilot’s fault! He didn’t tell me what time it was!”

    Agent: “I’m sorry, what?”

    Passenger: “The time! He didn’t tell me what time it was supposed to make an announcement about what time it is.”

    Agent: “Ma’am, as a former gate agent at the airport, I can assure you that the captain does make those announcements. Also, in the case that he does not, I happen to know that roughly every 15 feet within the airport, there is a clock on a TV, food service station, and in every lounge. May I ask where you were that you were unable to see the clocks or hear the gate agent?”

    Passenger: “That’s none of your business! Now, on top of paying for my hotel, I want you to pay me for my time that you’ve cost me by making me miss my flight. Give me back my money for this flight.”

    Agent: “So, ma’am, let me see if I understand this: you got on a flight, knowing you had a connection in Calgary. On your confirmation, it told you the time you would arrive and leave. The captain may not have announced what time it was over the PA system, but within the airport, there were many clocks and many attempts at calling your name to get you on your connecting aircraft. When you did not make it onto the flight, we re-accommodated you at no fee, and even gave you a meal voucher for your additional hours at the airport. Now, you would like us to give you a free flight, AND reimburse you for the hotel that you only get about five hours of use from.”

    Passenger: “Listen, are you stupid? You need to stop repeating me and get me some money.”

    Agent: “I’m sorry, ma’am; I am not going to be able to help you.”

    Passenger: “Tonight?”

    Agent: “Ever.”

    Page 1/712345...Last