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    Surely Knot Elastic

    | Sheffield, UK |

    Customer: “Do you make curtains to order?”

    Me: “Certainly. Do you have your measurements?”

    Customer: *pleased with his cleverness* “I couldn’t find a tape measure, so I used this piece of string. The width is from the end of the string to this knot.”

    Me: “Sir, this is a piece of elastic.”

    Customer: “So?”

    (He hands me the elastic string, which I proceed to stretch.)

    Me: “Is your window this wide, or this wide, or this wide?”