Tainted Love

(I am in an airport bathroom, and I overhear a conversation in some adjoining cubicles.)

Daughter: “Mummy, how much do you love me?”

Mother: “Oh, more than anything, sweetheart.”

Daughter: “More than anything in the world?”

Mother: “Yes, definitely.”

Daughter: “Mummy, how long have you loved me?”

Mother: “Forever. Since before you were even born.”

(Lengthy pause.)

Daughter: “Mummy, I pooed on the seat.”