Sour On Devouring Flowers

| Northern California, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(I’m working at a stall selling flowers in a popular farmer’s market. We have a large sign reading “EDIBLE FLOWERS!” to sell nasturtiums and organic, pesticide-free roses. A customer approaches.)

Customer: “Edible flowers? Are they made of sugar or something?”

Me: “No, sir! These are organically-grown flowers that are entirely edible. They’re usually used to add color to salads or as a garnish.”

Customer: “Like what?”

Me: “Well, these rose petals add color and a romantic flair to a dish, but they don’t have much flavor, rather like celery. Personally, I like the nasturtiums. They’re rather peppery and tasty. Would you like to try one?”

Customer: “You’re just putting me on, aren’t you?”

Me: “Not at all! Here, see?”

(I pick up one of the loose nasturtiums off the counter, pluck a petal off and eat it.)

Customer: “All right, I’ll try it.”

(I pluck another petal off the same flower and hand it to him. He puts it in his mouth and I see a pleasantly surprised expression spread across his face. I grin, happy to see he’s enjoying it.)

Customer: “HEY! Why’re you laughing at me?!”

Me: “Huh? I’m not laughing, I was smiling since you seem to be—”

Customer: “YOU TRICKED ME! I bet these aren’t edible at all! I’m gonna sue you!”

Me: “Sir, you just watched me eat part of the same flower—”

Customer: “You grow ’em! I bet you’ve developed an immunity and stuff! You tried to poison me, and now you’re laughing at me! I’m gonna sue you and then I’LL be the one laughing!” *storms off*