Smelly Cat Lady, Smelly Cat Lady, What Are They Feeding You

(It is a Tuesday late night, which everyone dreads, because of the infamous ‘Cat Lady’. She is a very lovely, quiet, but friendly lady but has one of the least pleasant aromas that I have ever experienced.)

Manager: *to Cat Lady* “Ma’am, I am just about to close. Please, can you go down to [My Name]’s checkout.”

(Cat Lady nods and smiles, and goes down my checkout. She places her few items on the conveyer belt and I can already start to smell her as she comes up to me.)

Me: *under my breath* “Oh my god, [Manager]. I can’t believe you did that!”

Manager: “Just wait, okay?”

(Cat Lady is about to reach me. Just as she does, my manager grabs a pot of fresh basil that had been left earlier that day and thrusts it into my face.)

Manager: “[My Name], smell this basil! It’s such a nice smell!

Cat Lady: “Wow, it’s so nice that you all appreciate the produce here!”