Situation Goes South (Park) Very Quickly

(The year is 1998. The South Park movie just came out and tons of kids attempting to sneak in to see it. I’m now seeing a mother and son.)

Mother: “Hey, I’d like two tickets for South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut please.”

(I look at the son, who appears to be no older than five years old.)

Me: “Um… ma’am. I’d hate to inform you, but this movie is not suitable for your child as it’s rated-R.”

Mother: “Why not?”

Me: “First off, even though it’s a cartoon, it’s NOT made for kids as it’s filled with swearing, offensive humor, and general themes not appropriate for kids. Second, South Park is well known by many parents throughout the state for its controversy.”

Mother: “I don’t care. It’s a cartoon, so it’s for kids.”

Kid: “Yeah! Adults are too old for cartoons.”

Me: *sigh* “Enjoy the show…”

(20 minutes later, the parent shows up again with her kid, visibly angry.)

Mother: “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THIS WASN’T A KIDS’ MOVIE?!”

Me: “Ma’am, I told you explicitly that this wasn’t for kids, but you ignored me as ‘cartoons are only for kids.'”

Kid: “MOM! TAKE ME BACK TO THE F****** MOVIE, YOU UNCLE F********!”

Mother: “You do not use that language with me, [Kid]! GET ME THE MANAGER NOW!”

Me: “Okay!”

Manager: “What’s the problem here, [My Name]?”

Me: “This woman is rather mad here?”

Manager: “Okay, what’s up?”

Mother: “This movie was not suitable for my child!”

Manager: “Which one?”

Son: “TAKE ME BACK TO WATCH THE F****** SOUTH PARK F****** MOVIE, MOMMY!”

Manager: “I think that answers my question. Ma’am, I believe [My Name] did tell you that this movie is not suitable for your child.”

Mother: “It’s a d*** cartoon. It should be for kids only. That’s made to corrupt the youth!” *she then hits the manager with her purse*

Manager: “Ma’am, please refrain from unruly behavior.”

(She then punches me in the face, and starts to harass me verbally.)

Manager: “I’ve had enough. GET OUT!”

Mother: “Why the h*** should I?! Give me back my f****** money, b****!”

Manager: “You’re harassing us and you’ve hurt my employee. Now get out or else I’ll call the police and you will be banned from the theater!”

Mother: “I think you’re mistaken.”

(She then attacked other customers. We called the police and she was arrested. She was sentenced to a month in jail.)