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    *Sigh*, They Grow Up So Slow…

    | Des Moines, IA, USA | Top

    (A customer slams open the door to our indoor paintball field and storms in, shouting.)

    Customer: “Where’s the manager?!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m the owner. What is the problem?”

    Customer: “I saw on your web site that you require a parental consent for kids to play at your field. Well, I never signed one, and my son said he’d been playing paintball here. He has bumps and bruises all over him, and I NEVER signed a consent form!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. He must have forged your name or had another adult sign for him. What’s his name? I’ll find the consent form.”

    Customer: “His name is ***.”

    (I find his form and show it to her.)

    Me: “Is this your son’s form?”

    Customer: “Yes! See, I never signed it!”

    Me: “Ma’am, your son is 27 years old. Only children are required to have a parent’s signature to play.”

    Customer: “But he is a child! He’s my child!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, let me rephrase that. Only children under the age of 18 need to have a parent’s signature to play. Since your son is 27, he can sign for himself that he understands all of the risks involved.”

    Customer: “This is insane! He could get his eye shot out, or be knocked out, or killed! This is illegal! I’m calling the police!”