Should Keep Gossip On A Knee-d To Know Basis

(I’m in a shopping centre. I have bandages on one of my knees from my kitten scratching me. I’m minding my own business, and overhear two women gossiping about the people around them, quite loudly. I’m standing right near them, and notice them pointing directly at me.)

Woman: “Bandages on the knees? You know what that means!”

(I turn around and smile.)

Me: “That I have a better social life than you?”

(They both looked mortified, and I got a high-five from a guy who had overheard.)