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    Should Get His Head Chequed

    | Australia |

    (A client calls in regarding a payment he is expecting from us. I determine the reason for delay, correct it and all that is left is the processing of the payment.)

    Me: “How would you like the payment, sir? Electronically or by cheque?”

    Client: “Electronically, please.”

    Me: “Not a problem. I just need your bank account details so we can transfer the payment.”

    Client: *short pause* “Who are you again?”

    Me: “I’m [my name] from [government department].”

    Client: “So this is [government department]? How do I know that’s true?”

    Me: “Well, you called me.”

    Client: “Did I? I’m still not sure. I think you’re faking it.”

    Me: “Well, sir, if you’re uncomfortable providing your bank account details over the phone, we can send the payment via cheque.”

    Client: “No, a cheque takes too long.”

    Me: “We currently don’t have your bank account details, so you will need provide them to us if you want electronic payment.”

    Client: “Well, that’s no good.”

    Me: “Cheque then, sir?”

    Client: “I guess, do I have to give you my address?”

    Me: “No, we already have your address unless…have you moved
    recently, sir?”

    Client: *exasperated sigh* “How would I know that?”