Customer: “… and I’d like a pack of cigarettes.”

Customer’s wife: “No, he doesn’t.”

Customer: “Yes, I do.”

Customer’s wife: “You don’t need them.”

Customer: “Yes, I do.”

Customer’s wife: “No, you don’t.”

Me: “No offense, sir, but she’s scarier than you are.”

Customer’s wife: “D*** straight!”

Also seen on: Not Always Romantic.