Several Musical Notes

(My choir teacher in high school is known for saying odd things that often end up being hilarious. My roommate begins keeping a list of them by writing them in her music and then putting them into a computer document. She even publishes a hardcover book and sends it to him. Here are some of my favorites.)

Choir Teacher: “One person cannot raise pitch. That’s like putting a balloon on the Titanic: it won’t do anything.”

Choir Teacher: “Have a nice weekend! Be safe. If you can’t be safe be smart. If you can’t be smart don’t get caught.”

Choir Teacher: “What are you waiting for? For that crescendo to write you a note? ‘Dear singer, please sing me! Kthxbai.’”

Choir Teacher: “Folks, if I could make you love dotted quarter notes, you would be a happier person. Take it out on a date… It’s tall, nice eyes, good sense of humor…”

Choir Teacher: “In the second and third movement I kind of picture Mary and Jesus in the Millennium Falcon…”

Choir Teacher: “You have to build a wall around your heart and soul, and it has to have a moat and sharks with laser beams and dragons that spit fire and battery acid.”

Choir Teacher: “We are put on this earth as musicians to show them [the audience] the beauty of the world… Truth, passion, love, belief: these are the things that are true.”