Customer: “Excuse me, what is that stuff in your greek salad? Gor-gon-zalla?”

Me: “Gorgonzola. It is a type of cheese.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, can I get a Diet Coke?”

Me: “Sorry, we only have Diet Pepsi.”

Customer: *suddenly angry* “Let me see your manager, NOW!”

(I retreat to the back and send up my manager. He has a three minute round with the customer. The customer departs, yelling, “I’m gonna sue you and your whole d*** company!” before storming out the door.)

Me: “What was he so mad about?”

Manager: “I was about to ask you the same thing. What did he ask you for?”

Me: “Cheese on our Greek salad and diet soda. What was he talking to you about?”

Manager: “The speed-dating event that was held here last night.”