Putting The Knee Into A Jerk

(I am a girl. I am feisty, outgoing and outspoken, while my girlfriend is shy, soft-spoken and a little timid. I finally convince her to go out with me to a club one night. She’s actually having fun on the dance floor. I step outside for a second to return a call from my sister, and when I come back, I see my girlfriend with a guy who is clearly trying to hit on her and making her nervous.)

Girlfriend: “Um… could you please leave me alone? I’m fine, thank you.”

Guy: “Come on. Let me have one dance, baby.”

Girlfriend: “Please don’t call me that, and I’m with someone. She stepped outside for a moment. She’ll be back any minute now.”

Guy: “Oh, a ladies’ night? Well, your friend should be happy for you. You’ve got a great guy on you.”

(The guy then puts his arm around her and tries to KISS my girlfriend. I’ve had enough and am ready to explode.)

Me: “Get your hands off my girlfriend!”

Guy: “Chill. I was just keeping your friend warm. I’m just trying to get her to have a good time.”

(He’s pressing up on her again, as if to be seductive. But, for what I think could be the first time, I see an angry look on my girlfriend’s face. She knees the guy below the belt and stomps on his foot with her stiletto heel. The guy cries in pain (literally – he’s crying) and walks off without another word.)

Me: “Good for you, but what made you do that?”

Girlfriend: “It was an accident, I swear! He pinched my side really hard and it was just a knee-jerk reaction. So anyway, after tonight, when can we come again?”