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  • Pressing All The Wrong Buttons, Part 2

    , | Central Oklahoma, OK, USA |

    Me: “Thank you for calling [bank] credit card services. Can I have your name, please?”

    Caller: “You need to turn my d*** speakerphone on before I can talk, so I can hear you across the room!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I can’t turn your speakerphone on for you. You have to do that yourself.”

    Caller: “All the other f***ing banks can turn it on for me! What do you mean you can’t?!”

    Me: “Sir, nobody has the ability to turn on your speakerphone for you, except for you.”

    Caller: “Well, why the h*** not?!”

    Me: “Sir, I can’t reach through the phone and push the speakerphone button for you. It’s physically impossible. You have to do it yourself.”

    Caller: “What the h*** do you mean you won’t push the button for me?! Are you saying you’re not going to come push my buttons?! Where the h*** are you located?!

    Me: “Central Oklahoma, sir. You have to push your own buttons.”

    *long silence*

    Me: “Anything else I can help you with, sir?”

    Caller: “You’re too far to push my buttons anyways.” *hangs up*

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    Pressing All The Wrong Buttons