Time To Sleep Sleep On The Bed Bed

(My boyfriend often talks in his sleep, and never remembers it. Sometimes, he seems completely awake when it happens. At this point in the story, I’m just climbing into bed after feeding our newborn son at two am.)

Boyfriend: *stares directly at me with eyes wide open* “…unless you bed bed.”

Me: “What?”

Boyfriend: “Unless you do the bed bed bed bed!”

Me: “…are you awake, sweetie?”

Boyfriend: *looks around the room, as if scrutinizing things* “…I seem to be.”

Me: “Okay, because that didn’t make any sense.”

Boyfriend: *snooooooooooorrree*

Me: “Really?”