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    Pills For Thrills Don’t Work On Tills

    | South Carolina, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal

    (A customer comes up to the register angry and acting pretty drunk.)

    Customer: “I bought this purse from you guys, and whenever I go to a store the alarm goes off! You need to fix it!”

    Me: “Ma’am, we’ve removed the sensor when you purchased it. You should be fine. It must be something inside your purse.”

    Customer: “No! It’s the purse! D*** fix it!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you really need to calm down. Our door alarm didn’t go off when you entered the store.”

    Customer: “That’s because it only happens at other stores!”

    Me: “Well, the only other option is to take your purse apart. I don’t think you want to do that. Are you sure you don’t have any prescription drugs or CDs in there? Those can sometimes trigger the alarm.”

    Customer: “I have pills, but they’re not exactly prescription.”

    *awkward silence before the customer realizes what they have said*

    Customer: “F**k you. I’m not going to jail for this!” *storms out*