Pavlov’s Yell

(A classmate of mine is constantly getting in trouble for chewing gum in class. My Religion teacher punishes this offense by requiring him to spit it out and put 25 cents in a jar for charity. One day, my teacher walks in and calls out my classmate’s name.)

Teacher: “[Classmate]!”

(My classmate immediately gets up, walks to the garbage can, spits out his gum, and puts a quarter in the jar.)

Teacher: “Ah, the power of guilt. Mr. [Classmate], I was actually going to compliment you on your perfect test score.”