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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Deposit Your Checks And Emotions Here

    | Madison, WI, USA | Rude & Risque

    Me: “You have [amount] available on your debit card.”

    Customer: “Okay, thanks.”

    Me: “Is there anything else I can do for you?”

    Customer: “Yeah, make the past not happen.”

    Me: “I wish I could!”

    Customer: “Yeah, especially ’cause I just broke up with my girlfriend.”

    Me: “I’m sorry to hear that.”

    Customer: “After three years!”

    Me: “Oh, that’s tough. Well, keep your chin up.”

    Customer: “Yeah, she called me while she was having sex with some other guy.”

    Me: *speechless*

    Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition, Part 4

    | Sacramento, CA, USA |

    (On our self serve copiers, the customer must press a button on the screen indicating whether or not they’re finished copying. If they press “YES” they receive a receipt to take to the cashier.)

    Customer: “I’ve never used these before!”

    Me: “Not to worry, it’s really easy.”

    (I proceed to give her the run down, including telling her not to press the “YES” button until she’s done with all of her copying for this visit. The customer proceeds to make one copy and press “YES”.)

    Customer: “What? I don’t want a receipt yet!”

    Me: “Well, ma’am, you just told it you were done making copies. Next time, press the ‘NO’ button if you still have more to make.”

    (The customer proceeds to make another copy and presses “YES”.)

    Customer: “Stupid machines!”

    Me: “Ma’am, if you aren’t done, you should press ‘NO’.”

    Customer: “I know! I know! I know! I know what I’m doing! I’ve just never used this machine before!”

    (I finally gave up trying and went back to my work. She eventually came up to my register with over a dozen copy receipts, complaining how stupid the machines were.)

    Related:
    Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition, Part 3
    Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition, Part 2
    Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition

    Doubling Down On Dumb

    | Rexburg, ID, USA |

    Customer: “I would like a double scoop of chocolate.”

    Me: “So you want both scoops chocolate? Or one scoop of chocolate and one of something else?”

    Customer: “Oh, I get two scoops?”

    Me: “In a double scoop? Yes.”

    Customer: “I’m so excited!”

    Facebook Page Book Giveaway

    | Facebook |

    To celebrate the launch of our new Facebook page, we’ll be giving away a total of 10 copies of the official Not Always Right book over the next five weeks.

    To enter into our weekly drawing, simply like our Facebook page and you’ll automatically be entered. Two winners will be announced each Monday on our site, FB, and Twitter.

    The winners of this week’s Facebook Page Book Giveaway are Doug and Tina — congratulations! They’ll each receive a free copy of our book via Amazon. Doug, Tina — a Not Always Right staff member will be contacting you soon via Facebook so you can receive your book.

    If you didn’t win this time, don’t worry — you still have four more chances. Just like our Facebook page today to enter!

    PS – if you liked our page before the announcement of this contest, you’re already qualified — anyone who likes our page will automatically be entered!

    Hair Today, Coupon Tomorrow

    | Salem, OR, USA |

    Me: “Thank you for calling [hair salon]. How may I help you?”

    Customer: “Do you do haircuts?”

    Me: “Yes, sir. We are a hair salon. We do haircuts.”

    Customer: “How much does it cost?”

    Me: “It depends on the style you want it cut into. It’s usually about [price] or so.”

    Customer: “Do I get a discount if I let you keep my hair when it’s done?”


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