Featured Story:
  • The Signs Of Change
    (1,292 thumbs up)
  • April Theme Of The Month: Losing My Religion!
    Submit your story today!

    99 Orders


    Via.

    Another Day, Another Disaster

    A Knowing Personality

    | Miami, FL, USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Top

    (I’m showing a couple our knife sets demonstrating the difference between each brand.)

    Me: “So, if you happen to be a rocker, that is someone who keeps a part of the blade in contact with the cutting board at all times, then you’ll want this type. If, however, you’re a chopper, who lifts the blade completely off the board, then you might find these a better fit since they have a shallower curve on the blade.”

    Lady: “Right, well actually he-” *points to her companion* “-is the one who’s going to be using them, so why don’t I leave you two to it, and look for the rest of the stuff on my list?”

    Man: “Sounds good.” *turns to me* “Hey, you got anything heavier? I like putting power into my chopping.”

    (I show him several additional knives, speaking about the differences in handle shapes and steel grade when he interrupts me.)

    Man: “Oh, and you do know that if these knives turn out to be cheap sh**, I’m going to have to come back here and have some very stern words with you.”

    Me: *taken aback* “Sir, these are made to the highest specifications of German craftsmanship. Says so right there on the blade.” *I gesture to the ‘Made In Germany’ stamp* “The ones in the cabinet next to me come from Japan, and are made using the same ore and techniques as samurai swords. If you’re going to honestly come back and tell me steel of this caliber is, to use your own words, cheap s***, then I have only three words to say to you: bring it on!”

    (The man stares at me, looking not so much offended as bemused. He then proceeds to tip his hat to me in respect.)

    Man: “I see you clearly do know your stuff. Please forgive me for doubting you.” *looks around for his girlfriend* “Are you as knowledgeable about the other products in this store?”

    Me: “Every one of them.”

    (He spies his girlfriend who’s speaking to another associate.)

    Man: “Honey come back here, we’re going with this guy! He’s got the know, and the personality!”

    (They proceed to do their entire order with me, and the man even insists on shaking my hand afterward saying he’s glad to have found someone with confidence in what they sell. Definitely among my best customers ever!)

    An Extra Shot Of Irony

    | England, UK | Food & Drink, Wild & Unruly

    (I am at a New Year’s Eve party.)

    Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

    Customer #1: “Yes, I need to replace someone’s drink. I accidentally spilt it.”

    (As it is only a small drink, I gave it to him without charge.)

    Customer #2: *to me* “How much of an idiot do you have to be to spill someone’s drink?!”

    (Customer#2 orders various drinks, but there are 2 expensive bottles of wine and mixer drinks with at least 3 shots of various spirits in.)

    Me: “All together that will be £50.”

    Customer #2: “No problem, but seriously can you imagine if I was as stupid as him and spilled these!”

    (Customer #2 turns with tray of drinks to return to his friends. As he does, he drops the entire tray, smashing the wine bottles and the other drinks all over the floor.)

    Customer #2: “I guess I deserved that. Don’t suppose I could have free replacements?”

    (The guy bought another round, as well as two more drinks, one for me and one for the guy he had been joking about.)

    Loves Listening To The Sound Of His Master’s Voice

    | London, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Musical Mayhem, Theme Of The Month

    (This particular music and entertainment retailer has just entered administration, meaning that all branches face closure and employees may lose their jobs. This has just been announced and there is a lot of press surrounding this. Stores remain open until the company either finds a buyer, or completely folds. Employees are in a state of limbo, waiting for news. I am a customer waiting in one of the smaller branches to pay when I overhear this exchange.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, I need to find this CD and you don’t have it.”

    Cashier: “I can look it up on the system, tell you if any other stores have it. At the moment I can’t order you a copy as our ordering services has been frozen.”

    Customer: “I refuse to go anywhere else. I need this CD right now. It was released in 1987. How can you not have it in stock?”

    Cashier: “We may have it in stock. Please give me the name of the artist and I will have a look. Please bear in mind we are a small branch so only carry limited stock.”

    Customer: “That’s not good enough. You have everything. I need this CD.”

    Cashier: “Sir, please tell me the name of the CD and I’ll see what I can find.”

    Customer: “You are absolutely useless. Why can’t you just tell me if you have it? Why don’t you have it? No wonder this company is in crisis.”

    Cashier: “Sir, I can’t search if you don’t tell me what you are looking for. Please tell me the artist’s name.”

    Customer: *suddenly screaming* “IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT THIS COMPANY IS GOING UNDER. YOU DESERVE TO LOSE YOUR JOB. YOU ARE A USELESS PIECE OF S***!”

    (The customer storms out. The cashier looks thoroughly upset. Thankfully, the next few people in the queue all approach the counter with a smile and a kind word. The regulars among us do not want to see this store close.)

    Page 987/2,600First...985986987988989...Last