(Not So) Clever Customers

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Fed Up With Customers

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Dressing Room Disaster

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Dealing With A Magic Bean Counter

| MN, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(One of my tech staff gets off the phone with a loud client. He is visibly frustrated.)

Me: “Next time he calls, put him through to me.”

Tech Staff: “Okay!”

(Minutes later, the call is escalated to me.)

Caller: “This is unacceptable! I demand you fix my issue!”

Me: “Well, unfortunately, you are using an unsupported email client. When you called us to set it up, we explained to you what would happen if you used this client. It appears that you did it anyway. We cannot fix it for you.”

Caller: “That’s unacceptable! We pay you good money to host this for us! I expect you to resolve this for me!”

Me: “Okay, sir. You are a financial advisor to your clients, right?”

Caller: “Yes.”

Me: “So, imagine a customer came to you, and told you they wanted to move all of their investments into magic beans. What would you tell them?”

Caller: “Well, that’s just stupid. I—”

Me: “EXACTLY! So, imagine they did it anyway, and came back to you a few weeks later complaining that they’d lost all of their money. Would you accept liability?”

Caller: “No, but—”

Me: “Well, that’s where I am right now.”

(We never heard from the caller again.)

Crazy Just Got To Another Level

| PA, USA | Crazy Requests

(I am handling a sales order with a customer. An older lady taps me on the shoulder.)

Customer: “I can’t find your elevator anywhere!”

Me: “It’s a one story building. I am afraid we don’t have one.”

Customer: “That’s horrible! My knees are so bad! I just can’t handle the stairs!”

Me: “We… don’t have stairs.”

(As I am replying, she has turned and walked away. About a week later, I get a call…)

State Employee: “I am calling to investigate a complaint we received that your store is violating ADA. Is it true you don’t have an elevator?”

Me: “Yes. I don’t have a second floor or stairs either.”

State Employee: “So, I just file this under ‘crazy’… gotcha.”

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