Loves Listening To The Sound Of His Master’s Voice

| London, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Musical Mayhem, Theme Of The Month

(This particular music and entertainment retailer has just entered administration, meaning that all branches face closure and employees may lose their jobs. This has just been announced and there is a lot of press surrounding this. Stores remain open until the company either finds a buyer, or completely folds. Employees are in a state of limbo, waiting for news. I am a customer waiting in one of the smaller branches to pay when I overhear this exchange.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I need to find this CD and you don’t have it.”

Cashier: “I can look it up on the system, tell you if any other stores have it. At the moment I can’t order you a copy as our ordering services has been frozen.”

Customer: “I refuse to go anywhere else. I need this CD right now. It was released in 1987. How can you not have it in stock?”

Cashier: “We may have it in stock. Please give me the name of the artist and I will have a look. Please bear in mind we are a small branch so only carry limited stock.”

Customer: “That’s not good enough. You have everything. I need this CD.”

Cashier: “Sir, please tell me the name of the CD and I’ll see what I can find.”

Customer: “You are absolutely useless. Why can’t you just tell me if you have it? Why don’t you have it? No wonder this company is in crisis.”

Cashier: “Sir, I can’t search if you don’t tell me what you are looking for. Please tell me the artist’s name.”

Customer: *suddenly screaming* “IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT THIS COMPANY IS GOING UNDER. YOU DESERVE TO LOSE YOUR JOB. YOU ARE A USELESS PIECE OF S***!”

(The customer storms out. The cashier looks thoroughly upset. Thankfully, the next few people in the queue all approach the counter with a smile and a kind word. The regulars among us do not want to see this store close.)

Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 2

| Leicester, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Top, Underaged

(I’m standing in a fairly short queue when a businessman walks in, pushes straight to the front and starts dictating his order to the 20-something year old cashier.)

Cashier: “I’m afraid you’re going to have to go to the back of the queue, sir.”

Business man: “I have an important meeting shortly. You must serve me now!”

Cashier: “Yeah, the longer you stand there, the later you’re going to be. Back of the queue.”

Business man: “Do you have any idea who I am?”

Cashier: “Nope. Now shut up and go to the back of the queue.”

Business man: “How dare you talk to me like that?! Get me your manager now!”

(The cashier sighs heavily, walks into the back, comes out with an older woman in tow and nods her towards the businessman, then disappears back into the back.)

Manager: “What seems to be the problem, sir?”

Business man: “That boy was incredibly rude to me! I demand you fire him immediately!”

Manager: “I’m afraid I don’t have the authority to do that, but if you want I can get the owner for you.”

Business man: “Bah! Fine, but I expect to be compensated for having to go through all of this trouble!”

Manager: “I’m sure you can discuss that with him, sir.”

(She then walks into the back, then comes out again with the now grinning cashier.)

Cashier: “Yo.”

Business man: “What’s the meaning of this? I said I wanted to talk to the owner!”

Cashier: “Like I said, yo.”

(The businessman silently gapes for a few seconds, then walks out stammering threats about having his head and closing the shop down.)

Manager: “Why do you always have to involve me?”

Cashier: “I just love the look on their stupid little faces when they find out I own this joint.”

(The manager rolls her eyes and walks into back.)

Cashier: “I love this job. What can I get you?”

Related:
Getting Owned By The Owner

On Vacation From Reason

| Windsor, ON, Canada | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Theme Of The Month

(I am a working at a salon though a Cooperative Education program at my high school, and am still a Senior. I answer the phone.)

Me: “[Salon name], how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’d like to book an appointment today with [employee who is on vacation].”

Me: “Sorry, [employee] is actually on vacation. I could book you with another stylist today or with [employee] when she returns.”

Customer: “What do you mean she’s on vacation? I need a haircut!”

Me: “Oh, well, yes she is on a cruise. But like I said before, I can book you with another stylist or—”

Customer: “No, no, no! This is unacceptable! I want to book an appointment today with [employee]! How could she go on vacation and do this to me?”

Me: “Well, she had vacation days to use up, so she is gone. Now, would you like to book an appointment for a later date?”

Customer: “No! I want [employee] to cut my hair today! Gosh, what don’t you understand? Are you stupid?”

(I try to explain several more times that the certain employee she is requesting has gone on vacation and would be back in a few weeks, but she simply won’t listen.)

Customer: “Fine! This is just ridiculous! I guess I will book an appointment with another stylist but this is just silly! [Employee] should not be allowed to go on vacation!”

When Tank Top Complaints Tank

| MA, USA | Bigotry, Health & Body, Religion, Rude & Risque

(I’m working third shift at a hotel and it’s my job to get most of the cleaning done. It gets rather hot so I often take off my thick work shirt and clean in just a tank top. Unbeknownst to me, our hotel is filled with a very conservative religious group of people. Two boys come to the desk while I’m wiping some things down. I’m very chesty and the tank top is slightly low cut showing off some cleavage.)

Boy: “Hello?”

Me: “Hey there. What can I do for you?”

(As I turn around, I notice two boys staring at me wide eyed and slack-jawed. They are probably no older than 13 and are dressed in very traditional garb. I quickly realize my faux pas and toss on my jacket. I get everything set and they go on their way. About half an hour later, I’m back in my tank top cleaning when an irate woman storms down and starts yelling.)

Woman: “Listen here, you little hussy! My boys are pure and sinless unlike you, you heathenish w****! How dare you dress like that and expose yourself to my boys like that! Have you no decency! Who let you out of the house like that?! I bet your husband doesn’t even know where you are! Did he let you get this job or did you sneak behind his back like the harlot you are?!”

Me: “Actually, ma’am, I’m a lesbian and don’t ever intend to let anyone tell me how to dress or what I can and can’t do. You have no right to be here yelling at me. You came to this society; I didn’t go to yours. Therefore, you can’t expect me to bend my way of living just because you are around. I realized I was over exposed and put on a jacket but it is hot in here and I’ve got a lot of work to do and would sweat to death if I kept it on. Now, if you would please be as so kind as to let me finish working.”

Woman: “You’re the devil’s spawn!” *storms away*

(In the morning, a man creeps up to the desk looking rather embarrassed. I put on my jacket again, fully expecting him to lay into me as well.)

Man: “I want to apologize for my wife last night. We understand that you aren’t a member of our religion and that you don’t have to conform to our rules. Thank you for covering up after realizing we are modest people. I am truly sorry for the way she spoke to you, and although it doesn’t excuse her insolence, I hope this helps.”

(He hands me a fifty dollar bill, and begins to walk away.)

Me: “Sir, you really don’t have to give me this. She was just trying to protect her children and although it was a personal attack, she was just doing what she felt necessary.”

(He waved a hand dismissing me, and left. When they checked out, he gave me nothing but good reviews and left me another fifty to make up for his wife’s behavior. The boys left me thank you cards that I got my next shift, and a few weeks later I got a letter from the wife apologizing for the way she acted and what she said to me!)

Greatest Moment In Human History

Page 981/2,593First...979980981982983...Last