(I am checking out a customer buying an MP3 player.)

Customer: “Does this come charged?”

Me: “I don’t think so, why?”

Customer: “Well, I want to listen to it on the way home.”

Me: “But there’s nothing on it.”

Customer: “There’s not? Where’s all the music then?”

Customer: “Can I get a milkshake, please?”

Me: “What flavor?”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “What flavor?”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “What flavor?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Customers friend: “She said what flavor.”

Customer: “Oh, I thought she was saying ‘White flavor’. I just thought that’s what they call vanilla in their country!”

Me: “Okay, sir. Since doing that doesn’t seem to be working, can you please clear your cache and cookies again and restart your computer, please?”

Caller: “Okay.”

(I hear fumbling on his line of the phone.)

Me: “Sir, just a quick question. Are you on a desktop computer or a laptop?”

Caller: “It’s on a desk.”

Me: “Okay, next question, does the monitor fold down onto the keyboard?”

Caller: “I don’t know.”

Me: “Does the monitor and keyboard have wires going from them to a big box with lights on it?”

Caller: “That’s way too technical for me to understand.”

Me: “Can you take it around with you around your home?”

Caller: “I’ve heard of flexible computer that people can fold up and take with them everywhere.”

Me: “That’s a laptop sir. Is that what you have?”

Caller: “I still can’t login!”

Customer: “Can you help me please?”

Me: “Yes, of course, what can I do for you?”

Customer: “Well, I want to buy some food for my cat, but mine doesn’t look like the one on the packet. Can I still feed it to him?”

Me: “Yes sir, of course.”

Customer: “Wow, really? Thanks!”

Customer: “Wow, I haven’t been to this theater since that movie Sex in the Time of Gonorrhea!”

Me: “Um, what?”

Customer: “Oops! I mean Love! Love in the Time of Gonorrhea“.

Customer’s Friend: “I think you mean Love in the Time of Cholera.”

Customer: “Isn’t that what I said?”