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    Weekend Roundup: A Day In An Employee’s Life

    , , , | Not Always Right | Roundups

    A Day In An Employee’s Life. This week, we share five stories that share the ups and downs (well, mostly the latter) of being an employee. If you’ve ever wanted to share with a friend what your job is like, send them this roundup!

    1. Teaching The Next Generation:
      Fold…unfold…fold…unfold…It’s a wonder more clothing store employees haven’t gone crazy!
    2. A Time To Laugh, But Mostly A Time To Cry:
      This one will get you teary eyed: A customer’s precocious little girl leaves a big, smelly surprise in the changing room.
    3. Mrs. Understanding:
      Teach your children by example…the example of poor, suffering employees, that is.
    4. In This War, There Are No Winners:
      When they say “stick it to the man,” they probably weren’t referring to the guy stuck cleaning up your mess with a mop and a broom.
    5. Nothin’ Like A Good Old Existential Meltdown:
      Customers often ask stupid questions, but on occasion they can have profoundly earth-shattering ramifications.

    PS: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 4

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Extra Stupid, Money

    (I’ve just finished ringing out the customer’s items. He hands me a gift card for another store. It’s the same color as our rewards card, so I think he just isn’t paying attention and has them confused.)

    Me: “Sir, this is a [store] gift card. We can’t take this.”

    Customer: “No, you can. Take the gift card.”

    Me: “No, I can’t. This is for [other store]. You’re at [hardware store] right now.”

    Customer: “No, take the gift card. I want to pay with that.”

    (This goes on for a few more minutes, with the customer insisting I take the gift card for the other store. I even run the card through the scanner just in case.)

    Customer: “Wait, that is a [store] gift card, isn’t it?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Customer: “And I’m at [hardware store], aren’t I?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Customer: “Oh.” *takes gift card* “So, what do I owe you?”

    Me: “$30.00.”

    (He hands me a $20 and stares expectantly.)

    Me: “And then it’s still $10, sir.”

    Customer: “You’ve got the $20.”

    Me: “Right, and $30 minus $20 is still $10.”

    Customer: “But you’re holding the $20.”

    Me: “Yes, but your total is more than $20.”

    Customer: “I gave you a $20.”

    (This goes on for a few more minutes, too. Finally…)

    Customer: “Wait, did you say it’s $30?”

    Related:
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 3
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 2
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up

    Does This Mean I Need A Water Stone

    | Connecticut, USA | Pets & Animals, Top

    (I am helping a man at the fish department when this happens.)

    Customer: “So, goldfish evolve into koi when they outgrow their tank…”

    (I look at him waiting for him to say he’s joking, but he’s completely serious.)

    Me: “It’s a fish, sir, not a pokémon.”

    To Whom This May (Not) Concern

    | Australia | Food & Drink

    Me: “Medium size latte for Sarah!”

    (A customer approaches and looks at the drink.)

    Customer: “Oh, sorry, I didn’t order a latte.”

    Me: “I’m really sorry about that, Sarah.”

    Customer: “I’m not Sarah.”

    Me: “You’re not Sarah and you didn’t order a latte?”

    Customer: “No.”

    Me: “I’m really sorry, but this isn’t your coffee…”

    Fake It ‘Til You Make It

    | Hackney, London, UK |

    Customer: “Hey, do you work here?”

    Me: “Yes, can I help you?”

    Customer: “Where is the pasta?”

    Me: “I’ll show you…it’s this way.”

    (He follows me to the correct aisle. As we approach, I see another girl in the aisle.)

    Customer: “S***, that’s my ex! Quick, pretend you’re my new girl!”

    Me: *surprised* “Wha—”

    (The customer grabs me, puts his arm round me, and practically drags me over to the girl.)

    Customer: *to ex* “Yea, I got a new girl. I’m over you.”

    Ex: “Um, okay? Great.” *walks away shaking her head*

    Customer: *to me* “So, since you’re my girl, do I get to use your staff discount now?”

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