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  • Bigotry Comes In All Shapes And Sizes
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    Not Your Dad’s Cowboy Movie

    | Phoenix, AZ, USA | Movies & TV

    (I’m working in the box office and it’s the opening night of “Brokeback Mountain”. An elderly gentleman and his ten year old grandson walk up to my window.)

    Me: “Hello! What can I get you?”

    Customer: “One child and one senior for Brokeback Mountain.”

    Me: “Sir, just so you know, there’s some scenes that may not be appropriate for children.”

    (He pauses and stares blankly.)

    Customer: “Oh, it’s nothing that he won’t see in real life!”

    (After he leaves, I inform the manager on duty of the situation. About 30 minutes into the movie, we watch as the grandfather and child literally run out of the theater and out of the building.)

    And He Said, Fiat Lux

    | Malibu, CA, USA | Hotels & Lodging

    (A guest checks into our hotel late at night. About five minutes later, he comes back to the front desk.)

    Guest: “My room’s supposed to have a view of the ocean. I can’t see it. Did you put me in the wrong room?”

    Me: *jokingly* “Well, it is nighttime…”

    Guest: *blank stare*

    Me: “Here, I’ll move you to the other ocean view room.”

    (I move the guest to the other room. Again, he comes back.)

    Guest: “I still can’t see the ocean! I reserved this room specifically for the ocean view!”

    Me: “I do apologize. If you still can’t see the ocean in the morning, we’ll give you a discount.”

    (The guest reluctantly agrees to this and leaves in a huff. However, he does not return the next morning.)

    Not Always Right: Official Android App

    | Android | Xcluded

    Introducing Not Always Right’s Official Android App!

    Update: Now also available in a free, ad-supported version!

    Easily view, share, and save all of the hilarious stories on your phone with the official app (requires Android 1.5 and up). You can even submit your own stories right from the app!

    Features:
    * Top stories – as voted by users just like you
    * Recent stories – daily posts, straight from the site
    * Random stories – practically infinite entertainment
    * Saved stories – easily save your favorites stories for offline viewing
    * Submit – upload your own stories right from the app
    * Share – send stories to friends, family, and coworkers via Facebook, SMS, email, and more!

    Get your app today!

    Not Your Only Loose Connection

    | Nova Scotia, Canada | Technology

    Me: “Thank you for choosing [company]. How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “My internet’s not working.”

    Me: “Okay, I can help–”

    Customer: “It’s your f***ing network!”

    Me: “Okay, I can see your frustra–”

    Customer: “[Company] is a piece of s***!”

    Me: “Ma’am, we’re both people and I’d respect it if you treat me like one.”

    Customer: *sigh* “Fix it.”

    Me: “Your ethernet cord is unplugged.”

    (The customer notices this and plugs in ethernet cord.)

    Customer: “Oh, I’m sorry.”

    Please, Say No More

    | Houston, TX, USA | Rude & Risque

    (An older man, maybe late 50s with graying hair, approaches my register with a few groceries. Despite his age, he is very absorbed in his cell phone and paying little attention to what is going on around him.)

    Me: “Hi! How are you today, sir?”

    Customer: *giggles* “I’m doing exceptionally naughty things on my phone right now!”

    Me: “Oh, that’s lovely! Do you have any coupons with us today?”

    Customer: *leans in and whispers* “In the colloquial, that means I’m sexting!”

    Related:
    Too Much Information, Part 6
    Way, Way, Way Too Much Information
    Way, Way Too Much Information
    Way Too Much Information
    TMI Redux
    TMI (Too Much Information)


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