October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

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| New Zealand | Extra Stupid, Language & Words, Top

Me: “Hi there, how can I help you?”

Customer: *says something unintelligible*

Me: “Pardon, sorry?”

Customer: *unintelligible* “…flat white…” *unintelligible*

Me: “Oh, a flat white? Sure, that’s $4.50, please.”

Customer: *seems to ask something unintelligible*

Me: “Pardon, sorry?”

Customer: *says something unintelligible again, irritated*

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t understand what you’re saying at all.”

Customer: “Oh! I forgot that I was talking Swedish. I wanted to know if the flat white is in a small or medium cup.”

Me: “Oh, thank goodness! I thought I was going crazy!”

Just Stole His Thunder

| St. Louis, MO, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Money

(I’m volunteering at my school’s concession stand at a football game. An elderly man comes up to the register. There’s a very long, impatient line.)

Me: “Hello sir, welcome to [school name], home of the [mascot]! How may I help you?”

Man: “I’ll have two hot dogs, a pretzel with cheese, nachos, a Diet Coke and a Sprite.”

(I hand him the hot dogs and sodas. The kids in the back are still working on the nachos and pretzel.)

Man: “Where’s my pretzel and nachos?”

(Right as he says this, the pretzel is ready. It comes wrapped in wax paper with a cup of cheese, and I hand it to him.)

Man: “What’s this?”

Me: “A pretzel with cheese.”

Man: “No! I want it in a tray!”

(I take the pretzel back and ask for a nacho tray. The nachos are still not yet ready.)

Me: “That’ll be $7.50, please.”

Man: *has money out and I attempt to take it* “Hold on, don’t take my money until I get my prize!”

Me: “Sir, there is at least $200 in cash in this register. If I wanted to steal money, I’d just grab some when nobody was looking, not from some guy who’s holding up a line!”

Man: *takes his food and backs away sheepishly*

Customers Providing Change For A Change

| Oakville, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I have seen only one customer all day: a regular contractor who normally goes to another location.)

Me: “Hey! What do you need?”

Contractor: “Just a roller sleeve; am I the first you’ve had all day?”

Coworker: “Well, with the roller you’re buying, so far we’ve made $13.79 today.”

Contractor: *throws a $50 bill on the counter* “Wow. Use the change to buy some magazines and snacks so you aren’t just sitting here anymore.”

Me: “Thank you! Oh, wow! You should keep this, but thank you so much. I’m dying of boredom!”

(Five years later, all I remember about that job was how awful my boss was, and how nice the contractor was every time he came in, no matter what was happening or how long it took to get his paint. He was always wanting the employees to be happy, and whenever he walked in we were.)

Send Him To The Sister Store

| Rahway, NJ, USA | Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month

(Our newest employee is a very sweet 18-year-old girl. She’s only been working for a week, when a customer starts giving her a hard time.)

Rude Customer: “You f***ing b****! Can’t you do s*** right?!”

18-year-old Cashier: *trying not to cry* “Sir, I’m sorry! You told me to take-”

Rude Customer: “Forget it! I’ll go to [similar store nearby], where they actually hire decent people!”

18-year-old Cashier: “I was only-”

Rude Customer: “F*** you! You’re probably some b**** who’s never worked a day in her life! I bet you’re not even in school! Probably just waiting to get knocked up so you can live on welfare and sit on your lazy fat a** all day!”

(He continues screaming at her and making disparaging remarks. I’m about to get the manager when a female customer walks in, sees what’s going on and speaks up.)

Female Customer: “Hey, will you shut up and stop being such a jacka**?! What’s your problem?!”

Rude Customer: “This b**** can’t do s*** right! She shouldn’t be working if she’s too stupid to do anything!”

Female Customer: “That ‘b****’ is my big sister and if you call her that again, I’ll knock your f***ing head off!”

Rude Customer: “Please! You’re probably about as worthless as her!”

Female Customer: “Try me.”

Rude Customer: “Crazy b****!” *runs out*

(It turned out the female customer really was the cashier’s sister. We were scared the cashier wouldn’t come back after that day, but she did and told us the guy was smart to run away because her sister, who’s only 15, really could’ve injured him if she fought!)

Assembling Your Change

| Leicester, England, UK | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Geeks Rule, Theme Of The Month

(I am in the queue for popcorn. A young red-headed woman wearing a ‘Stark Industries’ t-shirt is ahead of me. She get’s her snacks and moves away.)

Cashier: “Hey, miss! Excuse me!”

(She’s fiddling with two drinks and a large popcorn and doesn’t seem to notice him calling her. He comes around the counter.)

Cashier: “Excuse me! Hey! Miss Potts!”

(This gets her and she half turns around.)

Cashier: “Miss Potts, you forgot your change.”

Red Head: “Oh, thank you!”

Cashier: “Will that be all Miss Potts?”

Red Head: “That will be all, Mr. Stark.”

(She gives him a nod and a smile and moves off. He comes back behind the counter and turns to me, then laughs. I am wearing a Captain America T shirt.)

Cashier: “And what can I get for you, Captain Rogers?”

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