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    Less Is More, More Or Less, Part 4

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

    (I work in a large office supplies store that gives customers rewards coupons that act as a certain cash amount that can be spent on anything. We often send out separate coupons that expire on a Saturday, as that is when our sales change. This happens as I am working as a cashier on a closing shift on Saturday.)

    Me: “Hi, did you find everything you were looking for?”

    Customer: “Yeah, I think this is all I need.”

    (He hands me his rewards coupons, along with another coupon for $5 off a $25 purchase.)

    Me: “Oh, it looks like you’re not quite at $25, with only $17 worth of stuff. But your rewards coupons would take you down to around $3, so you’re fine!”

    Customer: “What? But I really wanted to use this $5 coupon. It expires today!”

    Me: “Well, you don’t have to use it, but I guess it’s up to you if you want to spend more money.”

    (The customer picks up all his things with a huff and walks away to look for more things. He returns almost 20 minutes later with many more things; one of the items alone is $40.)

    Me: “So, I guess you found more stuff?”

    Customer: “Yeah, this is how you get us to spend more money, huh? You give us these coupons that expire to force us to buy more at a time!”

    (Even with his coupons the guy spent around $30, ten times more than he would have spent originally!)

    Related:
    Less Is More, More Or Less, Part 3

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    The Good, The Bag, And The Lovely

    , | Kings Lynn, Norfolk, England, UK | Awesome Customers, Holidays

    (I spend about 20 minutes dealing with a middle-aged woman and her elderly mother, sorting out a rather complicated order. Despite my reassurances, they are continuously apologising for taking so long to decide.)

    Me: “Okay then, is there anything else I can help you with today?”

    Customer: “Nope, that’s brilliant; thank you! Have a lovely new year!”

    (The customers leave. About an hour later, the young woman returns and heads straight for my register, looking rather flustered.)

    Customer: “Hi again! I was in here about an hour ago if you remember me?”

    Me: “Oh, yes! Did you enjoy your meal?”

    Customer: “Yeah, but did you happen to come across a black leather handbag in your dining area? My mother left hers here!”

    Me: “Yup! I have it safe under my register for you. I found in just after you left!”

    Customer: “Oh, thank you so so much! You’re a life saver!”

    Me: “Not a problem; just doing my job after all. Have a good day!”

    (She walks off and I begin to serve the next customer. I can see her conversing with her mother out of the corner of my eye. She comes over again.)

    Customer: “This is for everything you’ve done for us today, young lady!”

    (She hands me what I thought was a scrap of paper, but is in fact a £20 note.)

    Me: “Thank you ever so much for the gesture, but I cannot accept this!”

    Customer: “No, no, you keep it! That’s for putting up with us today!”

    Me: “I can’t accept this, though! It was a pleasure to serve you, and thank you bu—”

    Customer: “Okay then, call it a New Year present or something! Bye now!”

    Me: “But I ca—”

    (She all but ran out of the store before I could protest further.)

    Belting Out Her Demands

    | Tacoma, WA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

    (I have just taken over a register where the guest has already been complaining the previous cashier was too slow.)

    Me: “Hi! Any coupons or gift cards you are using today?”

    (I move the divider out of the way to start ringing her items.)

    Customer: *gasps* “Um, yeah. You… you need to put that bar back down.”

    Me: “I am just moving it to start ringing your items.”

    Customer: “No! Put it back. It has to be there. The belt cannot move. Now!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I will be unable to reach the items if the belt doesn’t move.”

    Customer: “I will hand you the items. I will not have the belt moving!”

    Me: “Uh… why?”

    Customer: “I can’t have it move! I lose control of my items when the belt moves! I must be in charge of my items! IT CAN’T MOVE!”

    (She was having a freak out about the whole thing. I gave up and just tried to get her out as fast as possible.)

    Iron Chef

    | QC, Canada | Family & Kids, Geeks Rule

    (I’m working in a bookstore, storing cooking books. On top of the pile is Gwyneth Paltrow’s recipe book. A boy of around 10 walks by and stops next to me.)

    Boy: “Mom, look! Pepper Potts wrote a cookbook!”

    (Being a comics fan, he totally made my day!)

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