Tire Of This Dispute

| Raleigh, NC, USA | Family & Kids, Money, Transportation

(I am in the waiting room at a local tire place. A pickup truck squeals into the parking lot. A guy storms out and into the store. He demands a manager so he could dispute his son’s tire bill.)

Manager: “How can I help you, sir?”

Guy: “My son was in here earlier today, and you overcharged him! It shouldn’t have been [first amount]; it should have been [second amount]!”

Manager: “I quoted your son—as I do all customers—both amounts, sir. He chose the [first amount] option.”

Guy: “No, you didn’t! He said that you only gave him the [second amount] option. That’s too much for the menial service you provided.”

Manager: “I wouldn’t have done that, sir. I quoted him both options, and he chose the [second amount] option. He wanted, and I quote, ‘blingy-er rims’.”

(The guy realizes that he hasn’t been overcharged, and stops looming over the manager.)

Guy: “It just isn’t right that my boy has to use up his whole paycheck on tires! He’s a hardworking boy. It’s just isn’t right!”

Manager: “No, sir. It just isn’t right that I should have to dock my own paycheck, just so your son can keep his paycheck intact.”

Me: “That’s what paychecks are for, right? Paying someone for a well-deserved service and paying for necessities such as tires, right?”

(The guy turns beet red and leaves. My manager turns to me.)

Manager: “If he keeps squealing his tires like that, he’ll be back within the next month to get them replaced.”

Dining Sin

| USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Food & Drink, Top

(I’m a waitress, seating a woman next to a pair of young men holding hands across the table. They are talking quietly to each other, very obviously on a date. One of the men is drastically shorter than the other, making him appear much younger.)

Female Customer: “Well, isn’t that sweet, taking your little brother out? How old is he, 10?”

(Customer #1 blushes and bites his lip.)

Customer #2: “He’s 19, and he’s my boyfriend.”

(I’m about to walk away, when the woman gasps and shrieks at me in outrage.)

Female Customer: “HOW DARE YOU ALLOW THESE HEATHENS TO ACT LIKE THIS IN PUBLIC! YOU TWO SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES, YOU F*****S!”

(Both men visibly flinch. The smaller starts pulling his hand away, blinking back tears. The taller catches it and gives him a reassuring smile. Being bisexual myself, I’ve learned how to deal with this.)

Me: “Look at that couple over there.”

(I point to a girl and boy, on the other side of the restaurant. They are about the same age, doing the exact same thing the other couple just was.)

Me: “What do you think of them?”

Female Customer: “Well, they’re cute!”

(I point to the gay couple.)

Me: “And if one of them was a girl?”

(The female customer stammers furiously. She stands up, almost knocking the table over, and starts stomping away.)

Female Customer: “I’m never coming here again! I’ll have you reported for allowing these f*****s to sin here!”

(Luckily for me, my boss laughs in her face. He bans her from the restaurant, and calls other branches to warn them about her. The two men are incredibly sweet, and make sure to give me a twenty dollar tip. They’ve been regulars ever since!)

Hell Job

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It’s About That Time

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Sold-Out Flip-Out

| MD, USA | Awesome Customers, Crazy Requests, Technology, Top

(We have started carrying a very popular toy line. We run out as soon as each shipment comes in.)

Customer #1: “Hey, I’d like to pick up [newest figure in the line], for my son.”

Me: “I’m sorry; we’re sold out of that one right now. We have another shipment coming in tomorrow. If you’d like to call in the morning, you can check then.”

Customer #1: “F****** ridiculous! Do you idiots think that this is a proper business model? I know that you have tons of them in the back room. You just put them out a few at a time to create demand!”

Me: “Trust me! With how fast this series is selling, we would put them on the shelves the moment we could.”

Customer #1: “Yeah, whatever. And they’re more expensive here than at [competing toy chain] anyway. Also, your displays are too confusing. And these video game displays are nothing but naked girls and guns! This place is disgusting! What message are you trying to send?!”

(Another customer intervenes.)

Customer #2: “This is a nation-wide company with thousands of stores. He’s standing behind the cash register on Tuesday night. No offense to him, but even if there was a corporate-wide toy conspiracy, does he look like he’d be in on it?”

Customer #1: “Still, I’m just… whatever. Idiotic place!”

(Customer #1 leaves in a huff.)

Customer #2: “Sorry, I don’t mean to imply that you’re not important.”

Me: “Oh, you don’t have to apologize. That made my night. Would you like a free poster?”

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