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    A Bad Run For Their Money

    | Minnesota, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Top, Underaged, Wild & Unruly

    (My coworker is serving a group of five teenaged guys. All are very loud, obnoxious, and annoying. They don’t order a lot of food, and finally get up to leave. I am putting in an order then this happens…)

    Coworker: *to me* “THEY ARE RUNNING! THEY ARE RUNNING!”

    Me: “Did you get the license plate number?!”

    Coworker: “Yeah, right after the last guy paid, I noticed there was still one seat open with just a short stack of pancakes. I asked the guy’s friend if his friend was coming back to pay. He turned beet red, said “Yeah,” and that he would go get him. The car already was backed up and waiting when he walked out the door so I went to get the plate numbers quick.”

    Me: “Okay, give me the numbers. I’ll call it in.”

    (I call the police and give them the license plate and description of the car. About five minutes later, an officer shows up and gets a description of the guy who walked out on his bill. He says they may have the kids, and he will get the money for us. Ten minutes later, the officer shows up again.)

    Officer: “Here is the money for the bill. His friends had to pay for it so he wouldn’t get a ticket.”

    Me: “I was hoping you would have brought him up here to face his crime.”

    Officer: “Normally, that is what I would do. However, when we pulled them over for not paying the bill, we noticed the smell of alcohol. They are currently getting minors for underage drinking.”

    (In Minnesota, the fine for underaged drinking is $200. In the end, four of them were under age and drinking and got tickets for it. The bill he walked out on was only $4.55!)

    Speaking Of Rips…

    | Bella Vista, AR, USA | Liars & Scammers

    (I’m in the lawn and garden section and see a lady looking at some flowers. I see her pull a flowerpot off of the rack and tear the plastic container apart. She then turns around and sees me.)

    Customer: “The packaging on this item is broken. Can I get a discount?”

    Me: *unsure of how to respond* “Let me get you my manager, ma’am.”

    (I explain the situation to my manager on the way over.)

    Customer: “The packaging on this item was broken. Can I get a discount?”

    Manager: “Ma’am, we can’t give discounts on items that you yourself have broken.”

    Customer: “What a rip-off!” *leaves store*

    Peppered With Inconsistency

    | Clifton Park, NY, USA | Food & Drink

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like your tuna jalapeño sub without the jalapeños.”

    Me: “Okay, so you’d like a tuna sub?”

    Customer: “No, I’d like a tuna jalapeño sub without the tuna!”

    Me: “You want a veggie sub?”

    Customer: “No, you’re not listening! Give me a tuna jalapeño sub without the jalapeños!”

    (I just start making a tuna sub without saying another word.)

    Me: “And what kind of veggies would you like?”

    Customer: “Lettuce, tomato, and…hmm…how about jalapeños?

    Thank You For Shopping At Wrongway Mart

    | Amsterdam, NY, USA | Bizarre

    (I work at a rest stop in Amsterdam, NY, which is about 180 miles north-west of New York City. We are on the west-bound side of I-90. One night, two customers came into my shop to purchase some chips and soda.)

    Me: *ringing out the purchase* “That will be $xx.xx. Will there be anything else?”

    Customer #1: “Yeah, how long ’til we get to New York City?”

    Me: “You’re about three and a half hours away from New York City, but you’re heading the wrong way.”

    Customer #1: “Huh? Whaddya mean?”

    Me: “Well, New York City is southeast of here. To get there, you need to get on I-90 east, and then take I-87 south. Right now you’re on I-90 headed west toward Utica and Buffalo.”

    (Utica and Buffalo are about 240 and 396 miles away from NYC, respectively.)

    Customer #2:“Yeah! that’s where we’re going! Utica, Buffalo, New York City! That area!”

    Customer #1: *as the two leave* “NEW YORK!!! WHOO!”

    Come Clean With Your True Intentions

    | Bella Vista, AR, USA |

    (I am in the back doing dishes after the breakfast rush.)

    Manager: “Hey, [my name], a customer says that the men’s restroom is really dirty. Could you go clean it up?”

    (I go to the restroom to take a look. My manager comes with me. We quickly agree that the bathroom is not in any way dirty.)

    Manager: “Just sweep up a little and call it good.”

    (I leave to get the broom. While getting it, a customer comes up to me. At this point, I am not aware this customer is the one that complained to my manager.)

    Customer: “Is it okay in there?”

    (I assume he means is it okay to go in, and tell him yes. The customer goes in and comes right back out straight up to me.)

    Customer: “Bull****!”

    Me: “Is something wrong?”

    Customer: “That bathroom ain’t clean! I want to talk to your corporate office!”

    Me: “About what?”

    Customer: “This store is unacceptably dirty, and the workers are unfriendly!”

    Me: “I’m sorry—”

    Customer: “By the way, can I get a job here?”

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