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    Psychos Are Crazy Precise

    | USA | Language & Words

    (I sell jewelry at a major department store. A foreign customer comes in wanting to see some merchandise at my watch counter.)

    Customer: “I want to see a Psycho!”

    Me: “I beg your pardon?”

    Customer: “I want to see a Psycho!”

    Me: “Sir, I’m not quite comprehending.”

    (He points to the watches inside my counter.)

    Me: “Oh, you want to see a Seiko!”

    Size Matters, Part 8

    | Buffalo, NY, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science

    (A parent is asking about a supplemental document she needs to upload for her financial aid application. She’s having a little trouble.)

    Parent: “It says here that the file needs to be under 4 megabytes, but the file I need to upload is 4.49 megabytes. So, is 4.49 bigger than 4?”

    Related:
    Size Matters, Part 7
    Size Matters, Part 6
    Size Matters, Part 5
    Size Matters, Part 4
    Size Matters, Part 3
    Size Matters, Part 2
    Size Matters

    The Super Leap Days

    | Canada | Extra Stupid

    Customer: “So, when do I have to return this equipment?”

    Me: “The end of the month.”

    Customer: “So, February 31st?”

    Me: “No, February 28th.”

    Customer: “Why?! You said the end of the month!”

    They Are Not The Balls You Are Looking For

    | Gulfport, MS, USA | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

    (Note: I am a male. It’s the week of Easter and I’m walking through the store, when suddenly I hear someone scream at me.)

    Customer: “You don’t have any balls, do you?!”

    (I stop in my tracks, shocked. I turn around to see a little old lady.)

    Me: *laughing, embarrassed* “Um, what?”

    Customer: “Little balls!”

    (She shows me how small with her fingers. I stare at her, dumbfounded, jaw-dropped, and shrug.)

    Customer: “You know, the chocolate Easter balls!”

    Me: *erupting in laughter* “Oh, yeah, they’re right this way…”

    Urine A Lot Of Trouble Now

    | Gulfport, MS, USA | At The Checkout, Health & Body

    (A man walks to the counter and sets his item down. I grab the box without looking and scan it.)

    Me: “How you doin’?”

    Customer: “You tell me!”

    (I look down at the box I’m holding. It reads “Urinary Pain Relief”.)

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