Cold Hard Cash(iers)

| GA, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Workers, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(My mother is a cashier at a popular liquor store. I stop by to drop off her lunch. The credit card machines have shut down and the manager is in the back trying to get them running. The employees have let their customers know they will have to pay cash until then. Some customers leave for another store; most went next door to the bank ATM to get cash. One customer, however, isn’t particularly happy about this.)

Customer: “So, you’re telling me I have to walk all the way over to the ATM to get cash?”

(Note: the bank is right next door.)

Mom: “I’m sorry, sir, but the credit card machine is down for the moment. You can go to the ATM or go to another store.”

Customer: *scoffs* “Fine.”

(He leaves the store, and comes back a few minutes later with cash in his hand.)

Customer: “I had to pay three dollars to get money out of that ATM! I better get a discount!”

Mom: “I’m sorry, sir. I don’t have that authority.”

Customer: “I don’t care! I better get one!”

(He picks up a $50 Scotch and returns to my mom’s register; she rings him up.)

Customer: “Hey, you didn’t give me my discount!”

Mom: “Sir, I’m sorry but I can’t give you three dollars off because you made the choice to go to the ATM.”

Customer: “B****, give me three dollars off!”

(The store goes absolutely silent, and everyone is watching the exchange.)

Me: “Don’t talk to my mother that way.”

Mom: “I’ll tell you what I can do.” *takes scotch and puts it under her stand* “I can refuse to sell this to you.”

Customer: “I want to see your manager!”

Mom: “Fine.” *calls manager*

Manager: *comes over* “What’s the problem?”

Customer: “Your employee said, and I quote, “I won’t sell you s***!”

Me: “No, she didn’t!”

Mom: “Sir, I did not use that language towards you.”

Customer #2: “I’m a witness, and she didn’t say that.”

Customer: “I WANT A DISCOUNT!”

Manager: “Sir, leave. Now.”

Customer: “Give me my discount!”

Manager: “If you don’t leave right now I will call the cops.”

Customer: “Fine, call the cops! I don’t care!”

(The manager, Customer #2 and I, pull out our cell phones.)

Customer: “I’m never coming back!” *runs out of the store*

Me: “What was his problem?”

Customer #2: “That guy needs to pull up his skirt.” *smiles at my mom* “I’ll keep coming back for the wonderful customer service, and tough-as-nails cashiers!”

Tip Of The Entree Iceberg

| San Francisco, CA, USA | Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Top

(It is a busy Saturday night. During the dinner rush, I have been dealing with a table of two 20-something year old men. The blonde one has found something to complain about every time I’ve walked by while the brown-haired one just blushes and stays quiet. They’ve finished their meal.)

Blonde Man: “Are you new here?”

Me: “No, sir. I’ve been a waitress here for two years and three years at [other restaurant] prior.”

Blonde Man: “Then you have no excuse for how terrible this service was. The salad was wilty, and the entree was way too cold, and you were nowhere to be found. Plus, this place is far too noisy; I could barely hear myself speak! Honestly, I get better service at a fast food place.”

Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way. While there isn’t much I can do about the noise, I did offer to bring you different food before, but you said no.”

Blonde Man: *waves me off* “Just bring me the check, and try not to be so slow about it for once.”

(I go and get the check, but when I return, the brown-haired man stands up and hands me a $20 bill.)

Brown-haired Man: “Here, this is your tip. He wasn’t going to give you one. As a former waiter myself, I thought you were doing a perfectly fine job. My food was great, and the service was fast even though you’re so busy right now.”

(He turns to his blonde companion.)

Brown-haired Man: “People like you made my job so much worse, especially for making us work that much harder for no tip. So thanks for the meal, but you can go ahead and delete my number because there will be no second date. And by the way, potjevleesch is supposed to be served cold, you idiot.”

(With that, he left the restaurant without his date. It made the whole night worth it, to see that blonde man speechless for once.)

Smoking With A Gun

| Chesapeake, VA, USA | Criminal/Illegal

(We usually work in pairs because of the neighborhood, but my coworker is running late. A couple of regulars of mine find out and decide that they’d hang out until he showed up. I’m female. We are chatting when a very obviously inebriated man comes stumbling into the store and up to the counter. He reeks of urine and has a gun in his hand, which he lays on the counter.)

Drunk Customer: “Gimme [brand name cigarettes].”

Me: *trying not to look at his gun* “Long or short?”

Drunk Customer: “Short.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I hand him his cigs, and he fumbles with his wallet, still holding the gun. He tosses me some money, grabs the pack of cigarettes and stumbles out without waiting for his change. I take a deep breath, pick up the phone and dial 911.)

Me: “Um, yeah, there’s a drunk man with a gun wandering around [name of street]. You might want to pick him up.”

(After I hang up, one of my regulars, who’d backed up slowly into the aisles during this exchange, comes up to me.)

Regular: “D***, you’ve got balls of steel!”

He Said Water But With No Proof

| St. Louis, MO, USA | Food & Drink

Customer: “Can I have a Cranberry Vodka?”

Me: “Sure.”

(I make the drink by pouring the vodka in first and then adding cranberry juice. Pretty simple.)

Customer: “Why did you put all that water in my drink?”

Me: “Water?”

Customer: “Yeah, the clear liquid you poured in the cup.”

Me: “That’s the vodka.”

Customer: “Oh, this is gonna be a long night…”

Enabled By Kindness

| Estes Park, CO, USA | Awesome Customers, Money

(I am a seasonal employee in the Arts and Crafts centre in summer camp in Colorado. I am teaching silk painting, and there is one older, slightly disabled lady that neither of my coworkers could put up with. I help her every day and treat her just the same. It is the end of the last day of her working on her project.)

Lady: *to me* “Can I talk to you?”

Me: “Sure.” *heads over*

Lady: *discreetly presses $5 into my hand* “I know I can be difficult to work with, and you’ve been so nice and so understanding, and made me feel like I was a real artist. You deserve something nice. Go buy a good burger for dinner.”

(I blink and try to hand her money back.)

Me: “I really can’t, ma’am.”

Lady: “Oh, who cares, you deserve it!”

(She came back several days later to give me $5 more! She made my entire summer. I never ended up spending that $10. I have it saved as a memory of one of the nicest customers I’d ever had!)

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