(I had dealt with this customer three hours before this phone call to make an 16×20 frame. I’ve given them a copy of the bill so they can see all the information.)
Customer: “I think the girl who did my order made a mistake! I think she wrote the sizes in backwards.”
Me: “Backwards? Did she write 61×02?”
Customer: “No. Were it says ‘width’ she wrote 20, but the width is 16!
Me: “Did she write 16 as the height ma’am?”
Customer: “Yes! But that means the frame will be longer than wide.”
Me: “The frame looks the same on all sides ma’am. 20×16 and 16×20 are the same size. All they’ll have to do is turn it 90 degrees.”
Customer: “They’re smart enough to do that?”
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1,792 Thumbs Up!)
(Note: we sell fake jelly fish as tank decorations.)
Me: “May I help you?”
Customer: “I want some jelly fish, but I need you to answer some questions first.”
Me: “Of course. Go for it.”
Customer: “How do I keep them alive in this plastic packaging?”
Me: “They aren’t alive.”
Customer: “So why are you trying to sell them?!”
Me: “They’re decorations. They’re made of plastic.”
Customer: “How am I supposed to know this?”
Me: “They are plastic, have a string attached to them, have a sign that says ‘plastic jelly fish’, and they say ‘made in china’ on them.”
Customer: *pause* “I’ll just take one of those castle decorations…”
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2,063 Thumbs Up!)
Customer: “Do you all have a public bathroom?”
Me: “No, I’m sorry. It’s out of order.”
Customer: “What! What’s wrong with it?”
Me: “Well, someone clogged to toilet with paper towels and it doesn’t flush.”
Customer: “Well, can I use it and not flush?”
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1,361 Thumbs Up!)
(A customer brings in her desktop for repair.)
Customer: “Excuse me sir, can you help me? I’ve done something terrible.”
Me: “Yes, ma’am. What seems to be the problem today?”
Customer: “Well, I was on the computer, and all of these naughty images started to pop up. Well, I didn’t want my grandkids thinking their grandma was into something nasty, so I started to delete things and well…I’ve deleted the internet!”
Me: “It will be alright, ma’am. I think we can save the internet.”
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3,033 Thumbs Up!)
Me: “Welcome to [Fast-Food Restaurant], how may I help you?”
Customer: “I’ll take a number 1, 5, and 12.”
Me: “Alright, that’ll be $12.09.”
Customer: “Woohoo!”
(The customer drives to the window.)
Me: “That’s $12.09.”
Customer: “Woohoo!”
*pause*
Me: “$12.09.”
Customer: “Woohoo!”
Me: “12.”
Customer: “Woo!”
Me: “09.”
Customer: “Hoo!”
Me: “12.09″
Customer: “Woohoo!”
Me: “…09.12″
Customer: “Hoowoo!”
Me: “90.21″
Customer: “Ooh-oow!”
Me: “Well played, sir.”
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8,781 Thumbs Up!)
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