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    Pretty In Pink-Orange

    | San Francisco, CA, USA | Bigotry, Bizarre, Holidays

    (Last year I dyed my hair bright red, and by October it was starting to fade out to a pink-orange. I was used to getting a lot of comments about my hair and most were positive so I was taken by surprise when I was ringing up an older customer a few days before Halloween.)

    Husband: “Is that your real hair?”

    Me: “Yes. it is.”

    Husband: “Well. I like it. It’s nice. You look very pretty.”

    Me: “Thank you.”

    (His wife looks at him with a face that says she doesn’t appreciate him complimenting me.)

    Husband: *to his wife* “Well, she’s Halloween pretty, anyway.”

    Me: “…here’s your receipt. Have a nice night…”

    (My manager and I still haven’t figured out if I should take that as a compliment or insult, yet.)

    Acting Out Of Border

    | Kehl, Germany | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Language & Words

    (I am shopping in a store in Germany, really close to the French border, and only one full line is open. An elderly woman with only one melon asks the cashier if they could open a second line, which they do. When the second line opens, another woman with a full cart rushes in the other line to be first. The elderly women with the melon is second, and I am third.)

    Elderly Woman: *in German* “Please, I only have one item to buy. May I go through?”

    Other Woman: *in French* “I don’t understand what you say. Please stay behind.”

    Me: *in French* “She just wanted to go through since she only has one item.”

    Other Woman: *in French* “Aw, what a shame. I was here first! And she could at least speak to me in French! Tell her she has to stay behind like everyone else would have.”

    Elderly Woman: *in French too* “Are you kidding me? You French people cross the border to do grocery shopping here and WE have to speak in French? Also, I was waiting in the other line and asked for a new line. You just rushed like you were the only one in the store. How impolite is that?”

    Other Woman: *still in French* “I don’t believe how rude those Germans are. You can be assured that I won’t shop here again!”

    (The cashier finally let the elderly woman pass first, while the other woman was grumbling. Hopefully she’ll be more cooperative next time.)

    The Drink Of The Month

    | IA, USA | Food & Drink, Language & Words, Rude & Risque

    (I work at a kiosk of a popular coffee chain. It’s before school, and my coworker is ringing up a girl’s order.)

    Customer: “I want a peppermint mocha, but with no coffee in it.”

    Coworker: “Okay, so a steamer.”

    (My coworker hands me the cup and I can’t help but giggle a little.)

    Coworker: “What is it?”

    Me: “Oh, you wrote down PMS for the drink order.”

    Coworker: *laughing* “Oh jeez, I didn’t even think about that. But that’s what it is, a peppermint mocha steamer.”

    Customer: “That’s one way to start a morning.”

    (I make the drink and hand it to her.)

    Me: “Here’s your PMS, ma’am.”

    Customer: “Don’t go PMSing now!”

    Ruined By Ink

    | VA, USA | Liars & Scammers

    Customer: “So, you have to buy ink within 90 days to get credit for recycled cartridges? That’s not fair.”

    Me: “Yes. It didn’t used to be like that, but some people were buying cheap cartridges online and expired ones and recycling those to try and cheat the system, and the company was losing a lot of money, so they had to add that rule. Some people ruined it for everybody, haha.”

    Customer: “Oh, I did that! Ha, I’d buy generic ones off… ”

    Me: “…”

    Customer: “…”

    Me: “You were buying cheap cartridges online and expired ones and recycling those to try and cheat the system, so they had to add that rule. You helped ruin it for everybody.”

    Customer: “Oh. Huh…”

    New Ways To Sleep On The Job

    | Muskegon, MI, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Rude & Risque

    (I am a small, twenty-year-old female working the closing shift at my store. A very large, unclean looking man is at my till about fifteen minutes before close. He’s been silent up until I’ve started ringing up the last items he has.)

    Customer: “You get out soon?”

    (I don’t find this question odd, as many people ask it just to make conversation.)

    Me: “We close at eleven, so ,yeah. I get out just a little after that.”

    Customer: “Do you want a job working for me?”

    Me: “Uh… no. That’s okay. I already have a job here, and I don’t really have time for a second job. Thanks, though. Your total is [total].”

    Customer: “Well, it’s only nights. You don’t have plans after work, do you? The job pays well.”

    Me: “Actually, I do have plans. My boyfriend is picking me up after my shift.”

    (The man grumbles something incoherent, pays with food stamps, then leaves. My manager comes over, to help close my register down.)

    Manager: “What was that about?”

    Me: “I’m not sure. I think he was trying to pay me to sleep with him.”

    Manager: “You know, I was wondering if that’s what was happening.”

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