(I’m at a public pool that has pretty lenient employees at the “Snack Shack.” It should be noted that at the Shack, the customer pays BEFORE receiving their food.)
Employee: “Fries are ready!”
Little Boy: “My dad ordered those.” *takes fries and runs away*
(A few minutes later…)
Man: “Hi, I ordered my fries a while ago. Are they ready yet?”
Employee: “Uh, yeah. Your son just came by and already took them.”
Man: “What? I don’t have a son…”
Employee: *widens eyes* “Wait… What? That little lucky punk! He stole— argh. Sorry, I’ll get you your fries. Ugh…”
Weekly Roundup: 5 Stories Of Movie Magic And Mayhem It’s award’s season, where Oscars and Golden Globes and BAFTA’s compete for the limelight, but probably not for a movie-going audience as interesting as these!
- The Estrogen Empire Strikes Back, Part 2 (2,636 thumbs up)
- Harry Potter And The Deathly Embarrassments (3,806 thumbs up)
- Good People Are Not Dime A Dozen (4,013 thumbs up)
- Kids Movies Cost An Arm And A Leg (2,840 thumbs up)
- The Navi Ending Story (2,671 thumbs up)
PS #1: check out our Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!
PS #2: Read more roundups here!
(I am a regular at an internet cafe and am quite friendly with the staff. I’m at the front counter chatting with one of them, while there is a young lady working on one of the computers that’s becoming visibly more and more frustrated. Eventually she slams her fists down on the keyboard. The staff member looks up from our conversation and goes over to see what’s wrong as I listen in.)
Staff: “I’m going to have to ask you not to do that, miss, or you’ll have to pay for any damages. Is something wrong? Can I help you with anything?”
Customer: “The computer won’t respond to me! It’s not sending the email I wrote up!”
Staff: “Okay, I might be able to help you with that. How are you sending the email?”
Customer: “You don’t understand. The computer won’t respond to me! It won’t do what I want it to!”
Staff: “I understand, miss, but you’ll need to explain to me exactly what you’re trying to do so I can help you.”
(Suddenly the customer goes ballistic and starts screaming at the staff member.)
Customer: “CAN’T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT I HATE COMPUTERS?! I HATE COMPUTERS! I HATE COMPUTERS! I HATE COMPUTERS!”
(With this the customer picks up the keyboard and slams it down on the desk before pushing past the stunned staff member and running out of the internet cafe. The staff member eventually picks up and unplugs the now broken keyboard as I wander over to him.)
Me: “Why would she be in here trying to send an email if she hates computers?”
Staff: “I don’t know, but I’m going to go have a smoke.”
Rage Against The Machine
February 2014 Top Story Roundup: Here are Not Always Right’s top-rated stories for last month!
- In Threat Of A Disconnect (3,344 thumbs up)
- His Wife Will Have Hell Toupee (2,639 thumbs up)
- Mother, Daughter, Lawyer, Cry (2,578 thumbs up)
- Grand Theft Innocence, Part 8 (2,411 thumbs up)
- Channeling Good Customer Service (2,366 thumbs up)
PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!
PS #2: Read more roundups here!
(I work in a sandwich shop. It is just my boss and me in the shop when a customer comes in.)
Me: “Hi! What can I get for you today?”
Customer: “Hi. Could I please have a medium tuna sandwich, please?”
Me: “Tuna fish? All right.”
Customer: “Wait, it’s tuna FISH?”
(Thinking she thought I meant simply slabs of fish, I explained what our product was.)
Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t mean just pieces of fish. It’s tuna salad – albacore tuna fish mixed with mayonnaise and celery.”
Customer: “Yeah, but it’s still fish, and I hate fish. Why don’t you sub shops just have tuna? Why is it always tuna fish everywhere I go?”
(My boss had to make the woman’s sandwich, because I couldn’t fathom what was going on.)