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  • Got Him Out Of A Pickle
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    Some Parenting Choices Can’t Be Made Up

    | Yorkshire, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

    (I am stocking the make-up aisle in a large drug store. A customer is next to me trying on lipstick at the stand I am filling, with her three-year-old son sat on the floor next to her. I see him take the lid off a tube of foundation and raise it to his mouth.)

    Me: “Miss, you might want to stop your kid before he eats that. It won’t be good for him.”

    Customer: “Oh, yeah.”

    (Without looking away from the mirror she is using to try the lipstick, she pats the boy on the head.)

    Customer: “Don’t do that.”

    (The kid ate the foundation while his oblivious mother continued to test the products, and I moved away before I said something I’d regret.)

    Theme Of The Park Is All Natural

    | New River Gorge, WV, USA | Extra Stupid, Tourists/Travel

    Customer: “How do you get the boat to spin like we just did? Is it hooked up to wires?”

    Me: “Um… ma’am, we are rafting on a river. This is not a ride. There are no wires.”

    Customer: “I thought this was a ride, like at a theme park.”

    Me: “No, ma’am, this is a real river.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay. Guess I better not fall out, then.” *continues paddling*

    Got Him Out Of A Pickle

    | AZ, USA | Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (It is nearing the end of my shift and I am busy with cleaning the lobby since I have no customers. A girl’s volleyball team from one of the local schools enters and I wait on them. When they sit at their tables, they begin getting quite loud and obnoxious, deliberately spilling their meals everywhere, and some even throwing pickles at the window and seeing if they could really race them as they slid down, like in the movie ‘Billy Madison.’ While they are getting ready to leave, I am getting the mop bucket and such ready to clean up the mess straight away. The coach of the volleyball team stops me.)

    Coach: “Give me those.”

    Me: “Oh, no, sir. It’s quite all right. This is just part of my job.”

    Coach: “I understand that, but my girls were very irresponsible tonight. I need to teach them this kind of behavior is not acceptable.”

    (In a surprised daze, I give all my cleaning supplies over to the man and he gathers up all the girls.)

    Coach: *to his team* “You think this kind of behavior is funny? That you can just come in here, make complete fools of yourself, trash the place up, and just leave? I expected better from all of you. I hope you all have as much fun doing this young man’s job for him as you had making this mess.”

    (The coach forced his entire team to clean up the mess, from sweeping to mopping to cleaning off the windows, until the entire lobby was clean. The entire time he watched with a look of disappointment. I applauded the man for taking amazing action with teaching a lesson above and beyond a spot.)

    Fairness Is Limited

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Tourists/Travel

    (Customers have the option of buying a single-ride coupon or an unlimited rides ticket. It’s a particularly busy day, and the queue line on my ride is over 45 minutes long. The ride has just finished and most people are exiting, except for two customers.)

    Me: “Hey, gentlemen, the exit is out that way, when you’re ready.”

    Customer #1: “We’re staying on for another go.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but you will have to line up again to ride, especially since it’s so busy.”

    Customer #2: “But we have these.” *shows me his unlimited rides ticket* “See, unlimited.”

    Me: “Yes, you can go on multiple rides in the park, but you still have to line up every time. It’s only fair.”

    Customer #2: “But we have these!”

    Me: “As do most of the people in this queue, sir.”

    (On cue, most of the guests in the queue started waving their tickets at the pair. They finally left.)

    Can’t Keep Count Of The Account

    | FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (This customer is part of a rewards program for the store and calls in immediately yelling with a list of complaints. He eventually says his main concern right now is that he got an email saying his password was being re-sent on the site and he didn’t want it to be.)

    Me: “Okay. Well, I can delete your registration and give you your account number which you can use to create a new registration with the same account, so all your info will still be there.”

    Customer: “I don’t have time for all of this or to go online. Can’t you just fix my password for me and I can hang up while you do it.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. It is against privacy laws for me to know your password. I cannot do that.”

    Customer: “Then get me someone who can. Do you know how many accounts and passwords I have? If I have to do this all the time how can I live?”

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