November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Exchanging Un-Pleasantries

| Auckland, New Zealand | Extra Stupid, Money, Tourists/Travel

Me: “Hi there, how can I help you today?”

Customer: “Yes, hello love. I need US Dollars, please… I’m going on a family holiday to Italy then France.”

Me: “Ma’am, US Dollars cannot be used in those countries. Italy and France use the Euro.”

Customer: “NO, NO, NO! They use US Dollars; most countries use the US Dollar. It’s the most powerful money in the universe.”

Me: “Ma’am, I can assure you, US Dollars are not used in those countries. You’ll end up exchanging it for Euros when you get there.”


Me: “Ma’am, I work in a foreign currency exchange.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “Would you like the Euros, ma’am?”

Customer: “No, you smart little cow, give me US Dollars or I will complain to your manager!”

Me: “All right then, ma’am.”

(I give the customer US Dollars for use in Europe.)

Customer: “Now, that wasn’t hard to do was it?”

Me: “No, ma’am, thank you for your business.”

(She returned three hours later with her son (who seemed extremely annoyed with his mother) and exchanged the US Dollars back to the local currency then into Euros.)

Has No Time For Your Closing Time

| WI, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Technology, Time

(I am closing at the fast food place, so things are slowing down. I get a customer in drive-thru who orders a lot of food, and several drinks, all large. I have very specific rules on when to take orders when there are only three people, including myself working. As I’m taking the payment, someone comes up to order.)

Me: *after automated message plays:* “Just one moment, please.”

Customer: *after about 15 seconds* “Hello?”

Me: *as I’m trying to count out the change for the polite customer at my window* “I’m sorry, give me just a minute.”

(The process repeats a few times before the customer trying to order gets fed up.)

Customer: *talking to his passenger* “Fine, let’s just go to McDonald’s.”

(They then they drive off, rather impatiently. As I’m handing out all of the food for the customer at my window:)

Customer #2: “Sorry for ordering so much.”

Me: “Not a problem; you have a nice night.”

(About 10 minutes later, that same truck, with Mister Impatient, comes back and places an order.)

Me: *at the window during payment* “McDonald’s closes before us here.”

(The customer gave me a startled look, not sure how I knew.)

Dealing With Her Was A Walk In The Parking

| Australia | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Transportation

(I am the boss of a plumbing business and deal with a lot of idiots who try and park in my area and going to different stores. There are signs up everywhere that say that this area is only for customers. A woman parks her car in my area and walks across to another store. It is about an hour away from closing.)

Me: “Excuse me, miss, but you can not park here. This area is only reserved for the customers of this business.”

Woman: *angrily* “Well, I was just going to go next door so I don’t see why I have to move. Besides, I don’t see anything that says I can’t!” *walks away*

Me: *catching up indicating to all the signs* “Miss, look there are signs everywhere that say if you are not a customer, you are not allowed to park here. There are plenty of parking spaces at the shop you are going to. Move your car or I will call the towing company.”

Woman: *snottily* “You wouldn’t do that; otherwise I will sue you!” *walks away*

(I decide to just leave it and begin to pack up to leave. I wait for an hour and she still hasn’t come out. Getting impatient, I call the police asking them what to do.)

Me: “Hello, I am calling because there is this woman who has parked her car in my businesses parking area although there are signs clearly indicating the area is only for customers. We closed an hour ago and she still hasn’t come. What should I do?”

Officer: “Well, if she hasn’t come and it is after closing, then just leave her car in there and she can wait until tomorrow to pick it up. Also if you give me her registration we can give a fine for breaking the law.”

Me: “Okay, the registration number is [number]. Okay thanks.”

(I then proceed to close up the store completely, closing the gate and locking it, and also leaving a message to the lady:)

My Letter: “Hello, as you have been so rude and have ignored my warnings of not moving your car, I have locked it up and you can wait until tomorrow morning. Also be ready to receive a fine in the mail. Regards: The owner.”

(The next morning the lady had climbed the fence and was trying to ram down the gate with her car. Not only did her car get damaged, she got arrested and received a fine for breaking property.)

Has No Patience To Be A Patient

| Australia | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

(It is a very slow day so the doctor is hanging out at the reception desk. The receptionist is new. There is a phone call.)

Caller: “Does your clinic prescribe [common drug of addiction]?”

Receptionist: “Hang on; I’ll check.” *to Doctor* “Do we prescribe [common drug of addiction]?”

Doctor: “Not to new patients.”

Receptionist: *to Caller*  “Not to new patients.”

Caller: “Oh, okay. I’m having no luck today!” *click*

No Longer Deaf To Reason

| Baraboo, WI, USA | At The Checkout, Health & Body

Customer: “Are you deaf or something? I was trying to talk to you and you ignored me like an idiot!”

Me: “Yes, sir. Sorry, I was blown up by a landmine in Afghanistan and it destroyed most of my hearing in that side.”

(All the while I put on the most offended and hurt face I could muster. The customer’s face was quite possibly the best “I need to rethink my life” face ever.)