Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Motherly Advice To Mother
    (1,600 thumbs up)
  • September Theme Of The Month: Return Of The Geeks!
    Submit your story today!

    All [Retail Slaves] Look Same

    , | Washington, USA |

    (I fix registers and self-checkout equipment at said store. I wear a badge, it states which company I work for and has a picture of me on it. It looks nothing like the name badges the store uses but everyone asks me if I work there or if I can help them. I always answer politely that I don’t and point them in the direction of someone who does. But this time…)

    Me: *walking to back of store to fiddle with a printer that was acting up*

    Lady: “Can you help us with picking a TV?”

    Me: *Looks around* “Me?”

    Lady’s Boyfriend: “Yes you, we need some help here.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but I don’t work here.”

    Lady: “Look, I just want to know about some of the features.”

    Me: *dumbfounded* “Like I said, I don’t work here.”

    Lady’s Boyfriend: “Un-f***ing-believable…I guess this is what minimum wage pays for these days.”

    Me: *snorts and starts to walk away*

    Lady: “Well who the f*** is supposed to help us now?”

    Me: “Maybe you should try asking someone with ***-**** written on their name tag, I’m sure they’d be glad to help you out seeing as they WORK here.”

    Lady’s Boyfriend: “This is shoddy customer service! We want to speak to your manager right now!”

    Me: *shakes head and walks off*

    Lady & Boyfriend: *insert string of obscenities here*

    (I saw them 10 minutes later as I was leaving the store, they were complaining to a department manager. I’m sure they were trying to describe me because he had a very confused look on his face. Poor guy.)

    Honor Among Thieves

    | New Hampshire, USA | Top

    Me: “Your total is $87.95.”

    Customer: “I have a coupon for [X product]. It was for a dollar off.”

    Me: “Ok.” (I wait 30 seconds for her to produce it, but she stares blankly at the total on the screen.)

    Customer: “Well, aren’t you going to type that in? It’s for one dollar.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I just need to see the coupon so I can scan it.”

    Customer: “Well I don’t HAVE it with me…it’s at home. I forgot it, but it’s for [X product] for a dollar.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I can’t credit you for that unless you bring the coupon with you. You are welcome to bring it next time. Your total today is $87.95.”

    Customer: “So what, you don’t believe me? Why can’t you just give me a dollar off? That’s what the coupon was for.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I believe that you bought the product and that you have the coupon at home, but I am unable to give you the discount without actually physically having the coupon in my till drawer.”

    Customer: “Well that’s just the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. What ever happened to the honor system! It’s rude of you not to believe me!”

    There Is Such A Thing As A Stupid Question

    | Sitka, AK, USA |

    (I was a naturalist on a semi-submersible vessel for a summer in Alaska. The passengers get to sit in the bottom section of the boat, six feet below the water line, looking out of large windows. Over the course of the summer, I got a couple of fun questions.)

    Tourist 1: “Hey, where are all the tropical fish?”

    Me: *blink* “Um, in the tropics, sir. This is Alaska.”

    Tourist 2: “Are we going to see any bears?”

    Me: *looking out the windows at fields of kelp and bored-looking rockfish* “Sorry, no. We haven’t been able to get them to use the scuba equipment without chewing through it yet.”

    Who Needs Brains When You Have Money

    | New Hartford, NY, USA |

    ( I worked as a waiter at a country club with a bunch of really “Old Money” snobs. )

    Me: “We have a steak (of some kind, I don’t remember). And dude does it sound good!”

    Old Money: “Ahem! Excuse me! Did you just say dude?”

    Me: “Why yes sir. I did, I was just saying how good this dish sounds.”

    Old Money: “Well, excuse me young man. Dude AIN’T a word.”

    (At this point I’m thinking…are you seriously trying to debate this with an English Major by saying “Ain’t?”)

    Me: “Well sir, actually it is. A dude is a rich old man, like yourself, from the East who thinks they can live on a ranch in the West. And just for the record sir! ‘Ain’t’ is NOT a word! ”

    (Needless to say, I wasn’t allowed to wait that Old Man or his family at the Country Club ever again.)

    Yes, Let’s All Just Make Up Our Own Rules

    | Lubbock, TX, USA |

    (I work as a box office cashier and Saturday nights are the best due to funny things like this.)

    Lady: “I need two for 27 Dresses.”

    Me: “I’m sorry but the 7:20 is sold out. Our next one is at 10:00.”

    Lady: “Seriously? It’s sold out?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

    Lady: “So there aren’t any more seats?”

    Me: “No seats.”

    Lady: “What if I went and bought concessions?”

    Me: “Then you would have concessions, I suppose.”

    Lady: “I mean, if I bought stuff from inside, I can get seats right?”

    Me: “No. You’ll just have popcorn and soda.”

    Lady: “Are you sure?”

    Me: “Well typically when you get concessions, you end up with popcorn and soda.”

    Lady: “Yes. That’s true.”

    Me: “Can I ask you to step aside so I can help some other people if you aren’t ready to select another movie?”

    Lady: “Oh, yes! I’m sorry! I’ll be right back.”

    (About ten minutes pass and she comes back with a guy, popcorn and soda.)

    Lady: “Hi! Remember me? I need two for 27 Dresses at 7:20.”

    Me: “Um…I’m sorry, but that’s still sold out.”

    Lady: “But, I thought you said if I bought popcorn and soda, I could see it!”

    Me: *blink blink*

    Guy:: “HEY! IF you told her she could see it if she got food, then sell her the tickets!”

    Me: “Okay, fine. Just warning you there are only eight seats in the thea–”

    Guy:: “SELL US THE SEATS.”

    Me: “Okie dokie. $16.50, please.”

    Guy:: “WHAT? Oh, f*** that. Come on. The movie costs more than the food. Let’s just go rent something.”

    Lady: “But will the rental store have it?”

    Me: “There’s a Blockbuster right there. Go bug them.”

    Page 2,052/2,125First...2,0502,0512,0522,0532,054...Last