I am feeding the puppies at our animal shelter, and my manager comes up to me.

Manager: “If you see a ditzy-looking woman in pink hot pants, absolutely do not let her start any puppy adoption process.”

Me: “Why?”

Manager: “Because she just asked me if we can change their DNA to make them stay puppies forever, and I don’t want another living thing to be subjected to that level of stupid.”

Puppies give us so much, the least we can do is make sure they go to responsible homes. Sadly, that doesn’t seem to be the case with these 12 Stories About Amazing Puppies (And Some Customers Who Are Too Stupid To Own Them).

I used to work in IT as a student job for my university. We’d fix problems, set up machines and conference rooms, and rent out equipment like loaner laptops and projectors. Sometimes when the projectors and other loaner equipment weren’t really being used, we’d attempt to “advertise” by using one to project something random on the wall of our room.

One year, we decided to start streaming the World Cup on the wall. None of us were really sports fans, let alone soccer fans, but we had a diverse crowd move through, so it wasn’t distracting and it brought people into our office.

On day two or three, we started streaming, and we had a random guy come in all sheepish.

Guy: “Hey, uh, I hear you’re showing the World Cup?”

Me: “Oh, yeah!”

I pointed to the wall.

Guy: “You mind if I sit in for a bit?”

Me: “Nah, go for it.”

He was there for a while. He was a really nice guy and pretty quiet. We had almost forgotten that he was there when, suddenly, one of the event coordinators barged in like a bat out of h***.

Coordinator: “YOU! YOU’RE ON! NOW!”

Guy: “OH!”

He ran out of the room.

Apparently, he was the guest speaker who had flown in from outside the country. They were tearing apart the building looking for him and by sheer dumb luck stumbled across him in our office. He was there for at least thirty minutes, possibly an hour or more.

I don’t know exactly how long we delayed the conference, but from then on, we were banned from showing any World Cup matches. Apparently, it’s just too addictive.

I’m a self-checkout attendant. When I’m not helping customers, I’m making sure the checkout stations are clean and have enough bags. We’re slammed and I’m bouncing around like a ping-pong ball, scrambling to refill bags in between helping customers. My sole coworker goes to help a scowling woman.

Customer: “She ignored me!”

Coworker: “Hm?”

Customer: “That girl, running around with the bags! I needed help and she ignored me! She’s focused too much on the bags and not enough on the customers!”

My coworker managed to pacify her and send her on her way before coming back to tell me about it. I’m sorry you had to wait an extra ten seconds for my coworker because you slipped my notice?

I’m vision-impaired. I went to a bar with my sister and some friends. They were guiding me, so I was wearing my sunglasses but not using my white cane.

I tried to order a drink.

Bartender: “Why are you wearing sunglasses?”

Me: “I’m vision-impaired.”

Bartender: “But you’re looking right at me.”

Me: *Pause* “I don’t have eyesight but I still have a face!”

Bartender: “If you’re so blind, how’d you read the menu, then?”

Me: “My sister read it to me!”

Bartender: “But you’re looking right at me!”

Me: “…”

After an email and phone call to management, I got a big apology and was told that if we come back at a later date, to let them know and we can have a private room with free drinks.

I used to date a guy from my same course canal at university. We were together for five years, but toward the end of the relationship, whether because he felt he “had it in the bag” and could go mask-off or genuinely got worse in his ideas, he started making off-putting remarks and puerile sexist jokes. I thought it was a phase, so I didn’t ignore it outright, but eventually, I broke up with him over a specific incident.

I attend a graduation party for a coursemate, and he (the coursemate) has invited basically everyone he knows, including a guy nicknamed “Mr. Troglodyte” because of his clumsy mannerisms, his being a pop cultural alien, and his alleged general lack of class. 

At some point during the party, while a few lady friends and I go out for a smoke, Mr. Troglodyte, henceforth called “Dude”, comes to chat us up about our careers. At first, we try to hold our eye-rolls back, but after a while, my friends and I find ourselves actually talking nicely with him.

While we’re talking, my boyfriend walks by and waves theatrically at [Dude].

Boyfriend: “Oh, hey, [Dude]! How’s it going?”

Dude: “Oh, hi, [Boyfriend]. Is the party going all right in there?”

Boyfriend: *Shrugging* “Eh, it’s going smoothly, nothing much. By the way, which of these girls do you like best?”

I wish I were kidding.

Dude: “Uh… I think I like [My Name] the most.”

Boyfriend: *Goes wide-eyed* “No way, bro! That’s my girl! I can get really jealous, y’know that?”

Dude: “Mate, you’d need to be at rock bottom to lose your girlfriend to me of all people.”

My friends and I laugh, though I admit it’s mostly out of awkwardness than anything else.

Boyfriend: “Nah, bro, what’ve other dudes got that you haven’t got?” *Mimes a pinching and slapping motion* “All you need to do to get a girl is to slap their a** good and pinch their t*ts while they aren’t looking. All ya need is confidence!”

I stare, horrified.

Friend: “No, don’t listen to him. That’ll just get you punched!” 

Boyfriend: “Ah, c’mon. Women are pretty much all sluts anyway.”

Dude: “Seriously? You’re going to say that in front of your girlfriend?”

Boyfriend: *Acting nonchalant* “Anyway, wouldn’t you prefer having [Friend] in your bed?”

I excuse myself to go to the bathroom and splash my face several times to calm down, expensive makeup be d***ed. The rest of the party goes well; my soon-to-be ex is still pestering [Dude] or drinking several glasses with the graduating coursemate’s relatives. As soon as the desserts are served and things have quieted down, I decide to confront my boyfriend.

Me: “Okay, now that you are done with drinking, can you please tell me what has gotten into you?”

Boyfriend: *Confused* “What has gotten into me when?”

Me: *Sighing* “When you called me and my friends sluts in front of [Dude]. How could you, [Boyfriend]? How dare you?”

Boyfriend: “Aw, but c’mon, honey! I was just ridding myself of competition. Besides, I don’t think you were enjoying his talk anyway.”

Me: “Just because he isn’t the most interesting person on Earth, or the most suave, doesn’t mean he’s bad at talking. Also, what competition?!”

Boyfriend: “Do you know how hard it is to find a girl these days? I can’t let you slip past me like that, especially not to somebody who looks and acts like a caveman in a fancy suit.”

Speechless and irate, I went and congratulated the graduate, took the customary bomboniera (a traditional party favor), and then looked for somebody able to give me a ride back home, as I had no intention of going back home in my ex-boyfriend’s car.

I broke up officially over a text and have been looking since. No luck so far, and the aftermath was devastating on the face of it, but at least I grew wiser from it.