July Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

Taxing Faxing, Part 6

| Lakewood, CO, USA | Extra Stupid, Uncategorized

(We require full coverage insurance on vehicles we sell that we are financing in-house. I call the customer to tell her she needs to provide us with proof of insurance.)

Me: “We need you to fax us your current proof of insurance ma’am. You can have your insurance agent fax it over.”

Caller: “I’ll just use the fax at my work. I’ll be there in five minutes.”

(She calls back in an hour.)

Caller: “Okay, they said I could use the fax. How do I send it to you?”

Me: “Maybe you could ask someone there to help you?”

Caller: *yelling* “Bob! I need to fax this to the car place!”

Bob: *in background* “What’s the fax number?”

(I tell the customer the fax number.)

Customer: “Okay, it’s working.”

(My fax machine rings, and her insurance starts printing.)

Customer: “Now make sure you send that back to me, it’s my original and I have to keep it in my car!”

Me: “Um…it should be sitting on your fax machine.”

Customer: “Wow, these fax things are fast!”

Related:
Taxing Faxing, Part 5
Taxing Faxing, Part 4
Taxing Faxing, Part 3
Taxing Faxing, Part 2
Taxing Faxing

A Golden Snitch Short Of A Quidditch Match

| Bay Area, CA, USA | Books & Reading, Family & Kids, Movies & TV, Uncategorized

Me: “How can I help you?”

Caller: “This a bookstore?”

Me: “Yes, this is a bookstore.”

Caller: “Oh. I need the 8th Harry Potter book.”

Me: “I’m sorry sir, but there are only 7 Harry Potter books.”

Caller: “But I need the 8th one.”

Me: “There are only 7 books, sir.”

Caller: “Why?”

Me: “Because there are only 7 years at Hogwarts.”

Caller: “What does that mean?”

Me: “Sir, have you read the Harry Potter books?”

Caller: “No, my son reads them and he finished the 7th one and asked me to get the 8th one.”

Me: “Sir, if he read the 7th one, he would know that that was the final book in the series.”

Caller: “But he wants to read it. What can I do?”

Me: “Contact the author?”

Caller: “Do you have his number?”

Me: “Do I have J.K. Rowling’s number?”

Caller: “Yes.”

Me: “No. I… uh… don’t happen to have that on me.”

Caller: “Oh. Can you tell my son that there are only 7?”

Me: “No, I’m sure you’re quite capable of doing that all on your own.”

Caller: “He will be very upset!” *hangs up*

Pilgrim’s Pilgrims

Texas, USA | Movies & TV, Uncategorized

Customer: *walks up and takes a deep breath* “WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB! WE’RE HERE TO MAKE YOU THINK ABOUT DEATH AND BE SAD AND STUFF!”

Me: “So, one for Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World?”

Customer: “That sounds lovely.”

Second Thoughts About Second Sight

| Cleveland, OH, USA | Bizarre, Uncategorized

Customer: “My garbage disposal is clogged up.”

Me: “What is stuck in your garbage disposal?”

Customer: “A crystal ball.”

Me: “A what?”

Customer: “My crystal ball rolled off the counter and fell in my garbage disposal.”

Me: “You didn’t see that coming?”

A New Dimension Of Stupidity, Part 2

Macon, GA, USA | Movies & TV, Top

(I am working as a cashier at a movie theater.)

Me: “Here are your tickets, ma’am. The theater is on your right. Here are your 3D glasses.”

(About five minutes pass before I hear her complaining to my manager.)

Customer: “…and that girl didn’t tell me! She should be fired! I could have really gotten hurt tripping over the stairs. She never told me that I only needed the 3D glasses for the movie!”

Manager: “Ma’am, you don’t need the glasses for real life. Real life is already in three dimensions.”

Related:
A New Dimension Of Stupidity

Page 1,938/2,708First...1,9361,9371,9381,9391,940...Last