| London, UK | Uncategorized

Me: “Hello, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Hello, my brother bought one of your phones and had it shipped to my address. Now it’s here and I don’t want it here. Can you send somebody to take it back?”

Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t think we offer that kind of service. It’s up to you whether you hold onto it for your brother or post it back to us.”

Customer: “What?! I don’t want to be dealing with all this hassle!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I suggest you take this up with your brother, since he provided the shipping address.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! I can’t believe you won’t collect it! What would your company do if I killed myself over this, hmm? Because if I do, I’m going to sue your manager!”

Wireless, Clueless & Hopeless, Part 2

United Kingdom | Uncategorized

Me: “Hi there, can I help you?”

Customer: “Oh, yes. I need a…” *looks a hand written list* “…wireless Ethernet cable?”

Me: “A…wireless cable?”

Customer: “Oh, do they not make them anymore?”

Wireless, Clueless & Hopeless

Saved By The Boss

| Summerville, SC, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling tech support. What can I–”

Caller: “F*** YOU, B****! YOU G**D*** WOMEN HAVE NO F***ING RIGHT TO BELITTLE ME! B****!”

Me: “Um, sir, I think you have the wrong–”

Caller: “I SAID F*** YOU!”

Me: “Sir, this is tech support.”

Caller: “What?! Um…I mean…um…” *click*

(A few moments later, the phone rings again and I answer.)

Me: “Hello, tech support. What may I–”

Same caller: “F*** YOU!”

Me: “Sir, you have the wrong number.”

Same caller: *click*

(My boss who has been observing this the whole time decides to step in.)

Boss, to me: “I’ll handle the phone now.”

(Not surprisingly, the phone rings again. My boss picks it up, and before the guy on the other end can say anything…)

Boss: “Sir, if you keep pressing redial, you will keep reaching the wrong number.”

Same caller: “Oh, s***!” *click*

(He didn’t call back.)

In Hot Water For Hot Sauce

St. Catharines, ON, Canada | Uncategorized

(At my store, we charge for certain sauces if you get them on the side. I have just given the customer his food, but rather then leave he just stands there and stares at me.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Was there something else I can get for you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I want sauce.”

Me: “I’d be happy to get you some they are 25 cents. How many do you want?”

Customer: “No, just give it to me for free.”

Me: “I’m afraid I can’t do that. I’d get in trouble sir.”

Customer: “I won’t tell you manager!”

Me: “Actually, my manager is right there.” *points him out*

Customer: “Oh…well, give it to me anyway. You can get another job later.”

The Wind In The Windows

| Orlando, FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Technology, Top

Me: “Thank you for calling ***. How may I help you today?”

Caller: “I’m having problems with my computer and–”

(Suddenly, what sounds like an air raid siren sounds off in the background.)

Me: “Ma’am, I apologize. I was unable to hear what you said.”

Caller: “Stupid tornado warnings! They always make it hard to talk on the phone.”

Me: “Oh…should I let you go?”

Caller: “Nah. This happens all of the time.”

(In addition to the siren, I hear a door slam and the sound of someone else entering the room. I hear a male voice who I guess is the caller’s husband.)

Caller’s husband: “D*** it woman, are you crazy?! Get to the basement!”

Caller: “Oh, I guess I should go…” *hangs up*

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