October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Was Gonna Say Stupid, But She Already Called It

| Charlotte, NC, USA | Uncategorized

Caller: *sighs* “Well, I’m glad somebody decided to answer the phone over there. I’ve been trying to get through to you all day, but all I get is a busy signal!”

Me: “Ma’am, the phone has barely rung here all day. Are you sure you were calling the right number?”

Caller: “What? Of COURSE I was! I was calling the number on this here invoice you all sent me last week.”

Me: “I see. Do you mind reading the phone number to me?”

Caller: “It’s 704-366…oh. Now wait a minute. That’s MY number. Well, no wonder I kept getting a busy signal. I’ve been calling myself all day long!”

Caught Calling The Kettle Black

| Australia | Uncategorized

(Note: ‘Where The Wild Things Are’ has just been released at the cinema. When movies come out, the book usually sky rockets in popularity.)

Me: “Good morning, how can I help you today?”

Patron: “Hi, I was wondering if you have a copy of Where The Wild Things Are?”

Me: “I’m sure we do, but I have to warn you that since it has just come out at the movies, there will probably be a waiting list.”

(I look up the book, and sure enough there are 12 reservations)

Me: “I’m sorry, there are currently 12 reservations in place. I can put you down for a reservation but you probably won’t get it for another 4-6 months.”

Patron: “What? That’s ridiculous! It’s such an old book. Why are people suddenly interested?”

Me: “Well, when a movie is made out of a book, people are suddenly interested in reading the book.”

Patron: “That’s stupid. I don’t see why they should want to read it just because the movie has come out.”

Me: “Why did you want to read it?”

Patron: “Because the movie has just come out!”

A Beeping Idiot

| London, ON, Canada | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling [cellphone company], how may I help you?”

Caller: “Okay, now listen: this cellphone won’t make outgoing calls. What the h*** is wrong with it?”

Me: “I’ll check to see if there are any blocks on it or anything wrong with the account.” *beep*

Caller: “Did you hear that beep? It keeps doing that too!”

Me: “Wait, are you calling me from that cellphone?”

Caller: “Yes, why?”

Thinking Outside The Box

| Hahira, GA, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling [restaurant]. Can I help you?”

Caller: “I just picked up an order from you and it is completely wrong. It should not be so difficult to get an order right.”

Me: “I’m very sorry. What was the name on your ticket and I’ll see if I can fix this for you.”

(I pull the customer’s ticket and read the order to her.)

Me: “Is that what you ordered?”

Caller: “Yes, but I didn’t get it and my husband said he is very upset as well!”

Me: “What did you get ma’am?”

Caller: “Well there’s a large container of soup in here that I did not order and I haven’t even opened the Styrofoam boxes but I’m sure they’re wrong!”

Me: “Could you open the boxes and check for me?”

Caller: “Your d*** restaurant screwed up! There is no reason for me to open the boxes!”

Me: “I’m just trying to find out what happened to your order.”

Caller: “Fine!” *checks boxes* “Well the food in the boxes is right but I did not order any soup!”

Me: “Don’t worry. The soup was placed in your bag by mistake. You weren’t charged for it.”

Caller: “I’m still not happy about all this. I want to speak to a manager!”

(My manager took the phone, and listened to the woman’s story.)

Manager: “Just so I’m clear here ma’am, you’re angry because
you got free soup?”

Caller: *click*

Not Thinking Outside The Box, Part 3
Not Thinking Outside The Box, Part 2
Not Thinking Outside The Box

Good Music Isn’t Sharp, Sadly Doesn’t Apply To Customers

| Springfield, MO, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling [Music School], how can I help you?”

Caller: “Do y’all sell leather fanny packs?”

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, we are a music school. We do not carry anything like that. There used to be a handbag store in this location, but they have gone out of business.”

Caller: “Are you sure you don’t sell leather fanny packs?”

Me: “I am positive we don’t, as we are a music school.”

Caller: “Well, could you go check?”

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