October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

A Smoking Computer Is Always A Bad Sign

| Norrkoping, Sweden | Uncategorized

Caller: “My bong isn’t working!”

Me: “I’m not sure what you mean, ma’am. Could you explain what your problem is?”

Caller: “I told you! My bong is broken!”

Me: “Your bong, ma’am?”

Caller: “Yes the bong that goes in to the computer for my internet!”

Me: “Oh, do you mean your ‘dongle’?”

Caller: “Yes! That thing!”

Trouble Brewing, Part 2

| Midland, TX, USA | Uncategorized

(An obviously underage girl sets a 12 pack of beer on counter.)

Me: “Hi, how’s it going? Can I see your ID?”

Customer: “Sure!”

Me: *checks DOB on ID.* “Uhh, ma’am? This says you’re only 17. I can’t sell you the beer.”

Customer: “What! Let me see that!” *checks ID* “D*** it! I gave you the wrong one. Well, can I buy a pack of cigarettes?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Why the h*** not?”

Trouble Brewing

Hair Apparent

| Alberta, Canada | Uncategorized

(Two guys around 15 years old show up.)

Customer #1: “Hey, can I get one ticket to [movie]?”

Me: “Sure. I’ll just need to see a piece of ID please.”

Customer #1: “Oh, dang. I don’t have any ID.”

Me: “Sorry, I’m afraid I can’t sell you a ticket. It is an adult-only movie.”

Customer #1: “Can’t you just let us in anyway?”

Me: “Sorry, not without ID.”

Customer #1: “Well, hey, will this work?” *pulls out student ID card to a local high school*

Me: “It doesn’t have your birthdate on it, so no, it won’t.

Customer #2: “Well, can we pay you to let us in?”

Customer #1: “Yeah, we’ve got money.”

Me: *laughs* “Sorry, no.”

(Ten minutes later, they return with Customer #1 holding his finger above his upper lip.)

Customer #1: “Hey, I’ve got a mustache. Now can I have one to [movie]?”

Me: “No.”

Customer #2: “See, I told you that wouldn’t work!”

No Clue At The Zoo

| Utah, USA | Uncategorized

(We are hosting a visiting special exhibit featuring animals endemic to Madagascar. A customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I don’t think I saw the Madagascar inside the exhibit.”

Me: “I’m sorry, what?”

Customer: “The Madagascar. Was that the furry thing in the glass cage?”

Me: “Madagascar is a country, ma’am. It’s an island nation off the coast of Africa.”

Customer: “Don’t lie to me! I’ve seen the movie!

A Father’s Love Is Very Console-ing

| Scotland, UK | Uncategorized

Customer: “Excuse me, could you give me some advice please?”

Me: “Sure, how can I help?”

Customer: “I was looking to buy a Nintendo 360 for my son.”

Customer’s Son: “Dad! It’s an Xbox360!”

Customer, to me: “This is how much help I need. Would you please?”

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