Sharing One’s Loss, Part 2

| ON, Canada | Books & Reading, Uncategorized

Caller: “I saw on my online account that this book I have out is lost.”

Me: “Okay.”

Caller: “But it’s not lost, it’s right next to me. I can see it!”

Related:
Sharing One’s Loss

Date Fright

| Springville, UT, USA | Food & Drink, Movies & TV, Uncategorized

(I’m hosting and whenever I seat a table, I put an ‘X’ next to the server who got the table so that all the servers get the same amount of tables. Two women walk in.)

Me: “Hello, how many for you today?”

Woman 1: “Just the two.”

Me: *marking the next server* “Well, if you just want to follow me.”

Woman 2: “That wasn’t our name!”

Me: “What?”

Woman 2: “We didn’t have a reservation. That wasn’t us!”

Me: “Oh, I was just marking the server you’ll be having today.”

Woman 1: “Sorry, we just saw Date Night and they took someone’s reservation and almost died!”

When Life Presents A Fork, Choose The Right Way

, | Illinois, USA | Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers, Uncategorized

Customer: *walks up to the counter* “Hey, you guys forgot my fork and croutons!”

Me: “I’m sorry about that, ma’am. Here you are.”

Customer: “Well, don’t I get free food because you guys messed up?!”

Me: “You get a free fork and croutons.”

Close, But No Cinema

| Atlanta, GA, USA | Movies & TV, Uncategorized

(I’m working the outside ticket counter and an elderly woman comes up to buy a ticket.)

Customer: “I want a ticket to see [movie].”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. That movie’s not showing here.”

Customer: “Yes, you do. I’d like a ticket, please.”

Me: “No, ma’am, we’re not showing that. Did you see it listed in the paper? Sometimes some of the titles get switched around.”

Customer: “No. I saw the commercial for it and it said it was ‘showing at a theater near you’, and this is the closest theater to my house!”

When Two Wrongs Make It Right

| Washington, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Liars & Scammers, Top

(The night previous we had a customer shoplift about $300 worth of merchandise while I was on shift. Thankfully, while she did get away with quite a bit, she escaped with only one boot of a pair as I had removed the second boot, with ink tag intact, pending acceptance of her check.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [store name] what can we help you find today?”

Caller: “Hi! I was at your store last night and the lady that helped me shorted us a shoe!”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. What style was it?”

Caller: “A [brand]. It was the right shoe. She was going to take the tag off and never did! I live far away so do you think you could transfer it to the [different location] store?”

Me: “I don’t believe that would be feasible as we don’t have a way to get it to that store, but we might be able to mail it to you! Can I get your name, phone number, and address?”

Caller: “Sure. It is [name, number & address].”

(I get off the phone looking like the Cheshire cat. The thief had just given her full name, phone number, and address.)

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