Blind To Reason, Part 3

| Ballwin, MO, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling [store]. May I help you?”

Caller: *frustrated* “My husband has been in your store for over an hour and no one is helping him! I sent him in to match a red and white fabric!”

Me: “Okay, can you give me his description? I’ll send someone out to look for him.”

(The caller gives me her husband’s description, and another employee tries to find him. Five minutes later, the woman calls back.)

Caller: *angrily* “Hi, I’m the one whose husband isn’t getting any help at your store. He’s trying to match a red and white fabric for me.”

Me: “I’m sorry, I sent someone out to look. Do you know where he is in the store? That would help us locate him.”

Caller: “He says he’s by the red fabric. By the way, he’s color blind.”

Related:
Blind To Reason, Part 2
Blind To Reason

Customers Cause A Pounding Headache

| Bensalem, PA, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “I’d like a pound of Tilapia, please.”

Me: “No problem.”

(I put 3 pieces on the scale, and the weight comes to 1.02 pounds.)

Me: “Is that good?”

Customer: *sighs, then sounding utterly dejected* “Good enough.”

Smoke Your Veggies

| St. Louis, MO, USA | Top

(I’m a waitress taking the order of a little girl and her mother.)

Young Daughter: “I’ll get the mac’n’cheese. Extra cheesy!”

Mother: “No, you certainly will not. It’s your third day eating mac n’ cheese, missy! You’re going to get chicken and broccoli.”

Young Daughter: “But mommy! Eddie said that broccoli is bad for you!”

Mother: “Your brother most certainly did not!”

Young Daughter: “Yeah! The other day I saw him smoking his broccoli and when I asked if I could he looked at me and said that it’s very bad for little girls like me. His eyes were all red and everything!”

Mother: “When was this?!”

Young Daughter: “Yesterday! But his friend brought over more broccoli today. They’re weird.”

Me: *feeling very awkward* “Ma’am, I can get the check for you if you’d like to leave?”

Mother: “That’d be great. And could you box up an order of mac’n’cheese please? Oh, and some really good smelling stuff? I figure they’ll have the munchies and I want to torture them.”

The Elderly Fight Change

| New Zealand | Uncategorized

(I’m working the counter of a busy service station. An elderly customer comes in to pay.)

Me: “Good afternoon, sir. Just Pump 6 and the LPG today?”

Customer: *producing his bankcard* “Yes, that’s all, thanks.”

Me: “Great, your total is $46.71.” *rings up sale and waits for him to enter pin*

Customer: “Can I have my change?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir?”

Customer: “My change.”

Me: “Ok sir, I’m really sorry, but I’m not quite sure what change you mean.”

Customer: “What’s my total again?”

Me: “$46.71.”

Customer: “Great, can I have my change?”

Me: “Sir, you’re paying by card. You won’t get change as you will be paying the exact amount electronically.”

Customer: “Oh, I see.”

(He is pressing buttons on the keypad, but has not selected an account.)

Me: “Sir, you need to select an account.”

Customer: “Yes, I’ve done that.”

Me: “You want ‘Cheque’” or ‘Savings’?”

(He finally selects ‘Cheque’ and enters in a pin. After a few seconds, it comes up declined as he has entered an incorrect pin.)

Me: “Okay, sir, you’ve entered an invalid pin number. I need you to try again.”

(I ring up the sale again, and make sure he selects ‘Cheque’ again. He seems very confused.)

Customer: “What was my total again? I want to get this right.”

Me: “Forty six dollars and seventy one cents, sir.”

Customer: “Ok!” *punches in numbers and announces them out loud* “4-6-7-1!”

Me: “Hang on, sir. You’re entering your total instead of your pin number.”

Customer: “Well, yes.”

Me: “The total is already in our computer. You need to enter the pin number for your card so the sale goes through.”

Customer: “Oh. What’s my pin number, then?”

Me: “Would you prefer to pay cash, sir?”

This Won’t Pan Out Well

| Oakhurst, CA, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling [restaurant]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi. Yes I was wondering if you guys deliver.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t.”

Customer: “It’s only ten miles.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t deliver at all.”

Customer: “Well, does any place deliver at all?”

Me: “I’m not sure, sir.”

Customer: “F***. Well, I guess I’ll just get a DUI then. Thanks, bye.”

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