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    A Serious Case Of Old-Timers

    | Halifax, NS, Canada | Spouses & Partners, Uncategorized

    (I am cutting the hair of an 86 year old man. He asks if I’m from the area, and I tell him I live in an apartment building near by.)

    Customer: “So you live there with your husband?”

    Me: “I live there with my boyfriend and my best friend.”

    Customer: “You live with your boyfriend?”

    Me: “Yep.”

    Customer: “And you’re not married?”

    Me: “Nope.”

    Customer: “But you live together?”

    Me: “Right.”

    Customer: “I’ve never heard of that before.”

    Some Callers Are Proper Dementor

    | Racine, WI, USA | Geeks Rule, Movies & TV, Top

    (I have a caller named Victor Krumm in the computer system. I’m a Harry Potter fan.)

    Me: “Okay, sir, so you’re Victor Krumm?”

    Caller: “Yep, that’s me.”

    Me: “Sorry, this might sound funny, but did you know that there’s a book series called Harry Potter with a character with that name?”

    (There’s a pause, as if he’s thinking, and suddenly he yells.)

    Caller: “THE MUGGLES KNOW!”

    (He hangs up. His wife calls a little while later to actually schedule.)

    Pass(word) The Buck

    | Missoula, MT, USA | Health & Body, Technology, Uncategorized

    Customer: “I hear you are the go-to girl for computer problems.”

    Me: “Yes, I am.” (I scoot over to the computer.) “What’s the problem?”

    Customer: “I can’t remember my password.”

    Me: “I don’t know your password.”

    Customer: “So they lied when they told me you knew everything about the computers?”

    The Stupidity Never Stops

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Extra Stupid, Uncategorized

    Me: "Well, we performed the courtesy inspection we discussed this morning and found your front brakes at minimum specification. We do recommend getting your pads and rotors replaced at $**."

    Customer: *in a whiney tone* "Do I have to?"

    Me: "If you never need to stop your vehicle, I wouldn’t worry about it."

    Pride Goeth Before A Deal

    | Edmonton, AB, Canada | Canada, Money, Top, Uncategorized

    (I work at a call center in Canada dealing with American cell customers. This is a call from a customer in Seattle.)

    Me: “Hello, thanks for calling [Company]. How may I help you?”

    Caller: “Does your company outsource to India?”

    Me: “I don’t know for sure, but I know it does hire companies out of the USA.”

    Caller: “I’d like to cancel my service, then.”

    Me: “I can do that for you. May I ask why you’d like to cancel?”

    Caller: “I don’t support companies that don’t support America. If they’re hiring out of America, then I don’t want to support them.”

    Me: “All right, I’ll process that cancellation for you.”

    Caller: “Am I calling to India?!”

    Me: “No. I’m actually in Canada.”

    Caller: “Oh, I love Canada! I do all my shopping there. Everything is so much cheaper!”