October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Ooooooooh Dear

| Fort Kent, MN, USA | Funny Names, Uncategorized

(I am stocking shelves, a customer comes up asking for assistance to find an item.)

Customer: “I need to find some Eight O’s corn.”

Me: “I’m not familiar with that brand, ma’am, but I will do my best to help. Are you looking for corn that is fresh, frozen or canned?”

Customer: “How am I supposed to know that? It’s Eight O’s corn!”

Me:  “Well, is it cold?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Me: “It is probably in our frozen section, then. Let’s go take a look.”

(After pointing out our selection of frozen corn, she picks up a bag of store brand frozen corn excitedly.)

Customer: “This is it! Eight O’s!”

(I look at the item and see she has picked up an 8 oz. bag).

IQ Falls In The West

| Hays, KS, USA | Language & Words, Technology, Uncategorized

Me: “Alright sir, in order to get this taken care of we will need to know the manufacturer of brand name of the product.”

Customer: “I’m sorry, I don’t quite understand.”

Me: “The company that makes the product.”

Customer: “I still don’t understand.”

Me: “It will state who makes it on the product.”

Customer: “Oh, I know! It was China!”

Cinnamon Puns

| North Bay, ON, Canada | Books & Reading, Funny Names, Language & Words, Top

Customer: “Our daughter is looking for a book called Antonyms and Cinnamons.”

(I type it into our search system, but no dice.)

Me: “Would you know the author’s name?”

Customer: “No, I forget. It was something weird though. She wrote it down, but I forget.”

Me: “Might you mean Antonyms and Synonyms?”

Customer: “Yes! That’s it!”

(I search again.)

Me: “Nothing with that exact title is coming up. Was there more to it?”

Customer: “The author’s name. It was something funny. Sounded like a dinosaur. Wait, I think I might have it here.”

(She searches through her pockets and fishes out a little folded piece of paper.)

Customer: “Here it is. Antonyms and Cinnamons by Theo Saurus!'”

Enough To Make You Quai

| Florida, USA | Health & Body, Language & Words, Uncategorized

(I am trying to help a customer with a product while she is talking on the phone to her friend. Every time she asks me a question, she would go back to talking to her friend while I gave her the answer so I would have to repeat myself.)

Customer: “Do you have something that will help me with my period?”

Me: “Dong Quai.”

Customer: “I’m not crying!”

Me: “No, the product is called Dong Quai.”

Customer: “Oh.”

Not Quite Hammering A Point Home

| Wisconsin, USA | Family & Kids, Language & Words, Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling [store]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “My daughter is having her birthday in a few days. Do you do kids’ birthday parties?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Caller: “Do you come to people’s homes dressed up for kids’ birthday parties?  I was hoping for a princess theme.”

Me: “Ma’am, I believe you have to wrong number. This is a home improvement store.”

Caller: “No, I do not have the wrong number! I was told you do kids’ birthday parties!”

Me: “Uh, well…in our grocery department we sell candles. And cake mix. And frosting.”

Caller: “Oh, wonderful! Do you have decorations you could bring too?”

Me: “I’m not going to bring anything, but you could come in to our store to buy the cake supplies and some decorations from our wall-coverings department.”

Caller: “You have specific departments for kids’ birthdays? That’s wonderful! Where are you located and what are your hours?”

Me: “Ma’am, like I said before, you called a home improvement store. We, unfortunately, do not provide entertainment for children’s birthday parties, but we are located at [address] and our store hours are 6:30 AM to 10 PM.”

Caller: “Just perfect, you’ve been so helpful!  Have a wonderful day!” *hangs up*

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