(I, an asexual-aromantic girl, move into a new flat with two people: a lesbian and a nonbinary, pansexual person.
A week after move-in I’m trying to hang some shelves, but no matter how I hold them, the water level is messed up. I keep on swearing and re-doing it as my nonbinary roommate walks by)
They: What’s gotten under your skin?
Me: I can’t get any of these shelves to level! They’re all wonky!
They (while taking a sip of tea and walking by): I really don’t know why you’d expect anything in this flat to be straight, love.
(I never got the shelves level. The wonkiness adds to the charm, I guess)

My family has just come back from a day of skiing. I usually stay home to enjoy the alone time, and often end up baking. My brother and I are chatting.

Me: “I almost made lemon bars while you were gone.”

Brother: “What stopped you?”

Me: “I made something else.”

Brother: *RACES to the kitchen in search of goodies*

After a little searching, he was very happy to find a bag of fresh oat biscuits on the counter. Even the news that I hadn’t had enough ingredients for the planned double batch weren’t enough to dampen his spirits!

(Quick background Hazbin Hotel is YouTube series about how demons are living in hell. It’s18 over I’m 15 and I still watch it because it’s hilarious.)

It’s pride month and I have a pride tee on in a store when a man looks at my shirt and marches over.

Man: You’ll be going to hell for that nasty s**t ya know?

Another thing to note is that earlier I had gotten a message on instagram basically saying the same thing so I’m a lil tired of it

Me: Well if it means I can hang out with Husk and Angel dust (two of my favorite characters from the show) Then I’m happy to go!

The man back away slowly while some others teens start laughing behind us, one of them also displaying LBGTQ+ pride

Pride teen: Guess I’ll see you there!

My manager has an interesting method for dealing with customers who are still in the store at closing.

Manager: *To the customer* “If we don’t close our registers and set the security system after a certain time, the security company will call the police to come investigate what’s going on.”

She only did this a few times, but each time, it was hilarious watching them zoom to the checkout!

Some years ago I was at the airport on work travel, chilling at a gate, not really paying attention to anything around me, when I heard someone melting down in front of me.

Passenger: “What do you mean I can’t get on this flight?”

Agent: “Ma’am, your child is over two. They have no ticket.”

Passenger: “You don’t understand. We just visited my in-laws and are making a connection here. No one checked his age when we left our home, and no one checked his age when we left my in-laws’ airport. You have to let us fly.”

Agent: “No, ma’am. Your child is over two and has to have his own seat.”

Passenger: *Getting more shrill by the minute.* “No one else cares! We have to get home. You have to let us fly. You can’t stop us now when no one else did!”

After much arguing…

Passenger: “FINE! We’ll pay for a ticket.”

Agent: “Not on this flight you won’t. We’re full.”

Luckily at this point, I was able to board. I did feel bad for the mother with the two-year-old but it’s rather unreasonable to just HOPE that no one will notice your kid is over age.