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    We Have Confirmation

    , | Newington, CT, USA |

    (Our credit card machine went down, and we started to make signs for the doors alerting the customers to this. Before the signs were up, I had to ring up a customer’s order.)

    Me: “The total is ****. I’m sorry; our credit card machine is down.”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t see any signs!”

    Me: “The machine just broke five minutes ago while you were still in line. I was just telling my coworker to make signs a moment ago….”

    Customer: “I don’t have enough cash. How about debit?”

    Me: “Well, debit would use the same machine as the credit cards, but either way our store does not accept debit. Just cash today.”

    Customer: “How about a check?”

    Me: “Sorry, no personal checks. Just cash today.”

    Customer: *getting upset now* “Well, what do you expect me to do?”

    Me: “The last customer went next door to use the ATM to get cash.”

    Customer: “You’re being extremely rude, you know!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m just trying to explain to you that the credit card machine is down.”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t listen!”

    Me: “…”

    Seek, And Ye Shall Find…Eventually

    , | Glasgow, Scotland |

    Customer: “Hi. Can I have a cappuccino please?”

    Me: “Uh …sorry ma’am, but you’re in a furniture store. We don’t sell coffee.”

    Customer: “I didn’t ask for coffee, I asked for a d**n cappuccino!”

    Me: “Well, we don’t sell those either.”

    Customer: *looking hurt* “Why not?”

    Me: “We sell furniture. Look around you….”

    Customer: *starts crying* “This is the fourth time this has happened on this street!” *runs out*

    (As it turns out, she’d gone into a clothing store, a pharmacy and a grocery store, just to find herself a cappuccino.)

    Fond Future Memories

    | California, USA |

    Me: “Ok sir, your total today is $62.30.”

    Customer: *serious* “That was a good year. I remember it well….”

    Me: “6230?!”

    Customer: “Yeah.”

    Me: “…”

    Customer Of The Week: RTFM

    | Oregon, USA | Old Comics

    Customer Of The Week: RTFM
    Created by our friends at Quitting Time

    Original Story

    Finger Lickin’ Good Parenting

    , | Windsor, CA, USA |

    (A man walks up to our hot case with his wife and two little girls.)

    Me: “Hi! How may I help you?”

    Customer: “Hi – we wanted to get some chicken strips.”

    (As I am taking his order, I notice his daughters licking the hot case glass.)

    Me: “Excuse me sir, but your daughters are licking the glass.”

    Customer: “Yeah.”

    Me: “Well…aside from the fact that the glass is hot, we cleaned it this morning with a chemical cleaner to wash off a layer of grease build-up.”

    Customer: “So?”

    Me: “The chemical we used is a known carcinogen. I might suggest that you stop your daughters from ingesting it.”

    Customer: “Look, lady. You’ve obviously never been a parent. When you have kids, you’ll learn that it’s MUCH easier to just let your kids do whatever they want.”


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