July Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

Your Finances Are In The Brown

| NJ, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for using [bank]. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “My checking account looks like it’s in the rear.”

Receipt Cheat

, | TX, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “I thought that your tacos were 79 cents today.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, they are. If you’ll look at the bottom of your receipt, it’ll show you that the price was discounted.”

Customer: “But it says $1.09 here, not 70 cents. You did this wrong.”

Me: “Ma’am, if you’ll notice the bottom of the receipt, it has a negative amount. That means that much was taken off of the price of tacos.”

(The customer looks lower on the receipt and becomes indignant.)

Customer: “What? I don’t owe you 90 cents!”

Me: “No, ma’am, you don’t. That just says that’s how much was taken off the tacos to make them 79 cents.”

Customer: “But you charged me $1.09. It clearly says that your tacos today are 79 cents.”

Me: “Ma’am, can I see your receipt?”

(I take the receipt, and use a pen to mark out the price and put in $0.79 on it.)

Customer: “Oh! That looks better. Thanks so much.”

(She happily takes her food and leaves.)

You Bite It, You Buy It

, | Clitheroe, England, UK | Uncategorized

(I work in a charity shop selling used items. A customer walks up to me with a pair of gloves.)

Customer: “Are these gloves waterproof?”

Me: “They look it, sir.”

Customer: “I’ll just test them out.”

(The customer then proceeds to bite the gloves, covering them with his spit in the process, while everyone close to him looks on in horror.)

Customer: “Yes, I’ll take these.”

Her Head’s Up Where That Sandwich Is

| Kirksville, MO, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Hi, can I help you today?”

Customer: “I’d like about a pound of honey maple ham, shaved.”

Me: “Alrighty.”

(I start slicing.)

Customer: “I just want you to know, honey maple ham sliced by your hands is like eating a sandwich made of clouds.”

Me: “Um, thank you?”

Part-Time, Double-Time

| London, England, UK | Uncategorized

(I am working in a pub with two public entrances: it has one small side entrance and another on the main street on the opposite wall. A 20 year-old girl enters through the side entrance and approaches the counter.)

Customer: “Hi. I’m looking for a part-time job.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we don’t need staff at the moment.”

(The girl leaves through the same entrance, walks around the building, walks in through the other door, and approaches the bar.)

Customer: “Hi. I’m looking for a part-time job.”

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