November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Pre-Cog Movie-Log

| MI, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “The computer is showing you have a late balance of $5.60.”

Customer: “What? My movie was on time!”

Me: “Looks like it was two days late.”

Customer: “But I just returned it today!”

Me: “Yes, it was a five day rental. It was due two days ago.”

Customer: “But I rented it Thursday! It should have been due today!”

Me: “You actually rented it last Tuesday, exactly one week ago. For the confusion, I can remove your late charge for you this time. Just be a little more careful in the future.”

Customer: “That’s impossible! You rented me my movie on the wrong day! You rented my movie early!”

Me: “You’re saying that I was able to predict what you wanted two days in advance, entered it in the computer, and you came in two days later to get it and pay for it?”

Customer: “That’s exactly what I’m saying! You rented my movie early!”

Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 4

| New Orleans, LA, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Could I ask why you fled the scene of the accident, sir?”

Customer: “’Because I didn’t have no insurance.”

Me: “Wait, didn’t you say earlier that you were driving right now?”

Customer: “Yes, sir.”

Me: “…the vehicle from the accident?”

Customer: “Yes, sir.”

Me: “…with no insurance?”

Customer: “What part of ‘Yes, sir,’ do you not understand!?”

Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 3
Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 2
Pre(Car)ious Insurance

No Sting In This Tale, Part 2

| FL, USA | Uncategorized

Beach Patron: “Excuse me, are these blue jelly things on the beach dangerous?”

Me: “Yes sir, they are in fact Portuguese Man-o-War. They are extremely painful and can still sting you while on land.”

Beach Patron: “They can’t walk, can they?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Beach Patron: “Meaning they can’t walk on land and chase you?”

Me: “No sir, they only live in water.”

Beach Patron: “I feel much safer. Thank you.”

No Sting In This Tale

Living On The Edge (Comic)

| NEW YORK, NY, USA | Old Comics

Original Story | Comic by EvilNessie

Say No To Yes

| NY, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “Hello.”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “Where do you have–wait, did you say ‘Yes’?”

Me: *confused* “Excuse me?”

Customer: “I said ‘Hello,’ and you said ‘Yes.’ Is that what just happened?”

Me: “I believe so.”

(She rolls her eyes and quickly walks out the store.)