November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

The Elderly Fight Change

| New Zealand | Uncategorized

(I’m working the counter of a busy service station. An elderly customer comes in to pay.)

Me: “Good afternoon, sir. Just Pump 6 and the LPG today?”

Customer: *producing his bankcard* “Yes, that’s all, thanks.”

Me: “Great, your total is $46.71.” *rings up sale and waits for him to enter pin*

Customer: “Can I have my change?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir?”

Customer: “My change.”

Me: “Ok sir, I’m really sorry, but I’m not quite sure what change you mean.”

Customer: “What’s my total again?”

Me: “$46.71.”

Customer: “Great, can I have my change?”

Me: “Sir, you’re paying by card. You won’t get change as you will be paying the exact amount electronically.”

Customer: “Oh, I see.”

(He is pressing buttons on the keypad, but has not selected an account.)

Me: “Sir, you need to select an account.”

Customer: “Yes, I’ve done that.”

Me: “You want ‘Cheque’” or ‘Savings’?”

(He finally selects ‘Cheque’ and enters in a pin. After a few seconds, it comes up declined as he has entered an incorrect pin.)

Me: “Okay, sir, you’ve entered an invalid pin number. I need you to try again.”

(I ring up the sale again, and make sure he selects ‘Cheque’ again. He seems very confused.)

Customer: “What was my total again? I want to get this right.”

Me: “Forty six dollars and seventy one cents, sir.”

Customer: “Ok!” *punches in numbers and announces them out loud* “4-6-7-1!”

Me: “Hang on, sir. You’re entering your total instead of your pin number.”

Customer: “Well, yes.”

Me: “The total is already in our computer. You need to enter the pin number for your card so the sale goes through.”

Customer: “Oh. What’s my pin number, then?”

Me: “Would you prefer to pay cash, sir?”

This Won’t Pan Out Well

| Oakhurst, CA, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling [restaurant]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi. Yes I was wondering if you guys deliver.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t.”

Customer: “It’s only ten miles.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t deliver at all.”

Customer: “Well, does any place deliver at all?”

Me: “I’m not sure, sir.”

Customer: “F***. Well, I guess I’ll just get a DUI then. Thanks, bye.”

Full Time Care(less)

| Omaha, NE, USA | Uncategorized

(The following is what I overhear after I let a customer use the store phone.)

Customer: “Come on, pick up the phone! You in a d*** wheelchair, I know you’re there! I left you upstairs for a reason!”

Parking Up The Wrong Tree

| OH, USA | Uncategorized

(A customer walks in to the Service Desk.)

Customer: “This is ridiculous!”

Me: “Is there something that I can help you with?”

Customer: “That car in your parking lot has been sitting there for over a week and has not been moved! Shouldn’t you guys do something about that? I live across the street and I am absolutely sick of looking at it!”

Me: “Well, ma’am, it is broken down and we have informed the Sheriff’s department about it. It will be towed if they cannot contact the owner.”

Customer: “Well, that is absolutely the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard! Cars that have nothing to do with the store should not be parked here! I am so angry! Where are my dinner guests going to park now?!”

You Couldn’t Make It Up

| St. Louis, MO, USA | Top

(My job is to call people and pitch the brand of make-up my company sells. I call and an obviously really young girl answers the phone.)

Little Girl: “Hello?”

Me: “Hi, may I talk to the lady of this residence?”

Little Girl: “That’s me.”

Me: “I mean, may I talk to your mom?”

Little Girl: “I have two dads.”

Me: “Oh well, never mind then. Have a nice day!”

Little Girl: “Wait! Why did you call?”

Me: “I’m selling make-up.”

Little Girl: “Oh! One of my daddies loves that stuff. It makes him look pretty when he goes dancing! Let me give him the phone! Dad! Dad! Some girl wants to make you look pretty!”