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  • Gave Them A Rude Awakening
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    Gambling With His Life

    | Winnipeg, MB, Canada |

    (It’s been snowing for the last few days, and the roads are making travel difficult.)

    Customer: “Boy! Those roads are horrible!”

    Me: “Yes sir, so I’ve heard.”

    Customer: “I don’t know why anyone would be out in this if they didn’t have to be!”

    Me: “I agree. What can I help you with?”

    Customer: “Oh, I need some cigarettes and lottery tickets.”

    The Birds And The Bees Talk, Illustrated (Comic)

    | Belgium | Old Comics


    Original Story | Comic by EvilNessie

    Should Have Heard It From The Grape Vine

    | Cleveland, OH, USA |

    (I work the register and a young customer puts her stuff onto the belt.)

    Me: “How are you doing today?”

    Customer: “Good, just buying stuff for my culinary class.”

    (I notice she has cooking wine, which requires a person to be 21 to buy.)

    Me: “Can I see your ID, please?”

    Customer: “Why?”

    Me: “You have to be 21 to purchase the cooking wine.”

    Customer: “You mean cooking wine is actually wine?”

    New Years Resolution: Get A Brain

    | Manistee, MI, USA |

    (Every year in December at our buffet, we give out Chinese wall scroll calendars for the upcoming year.)

    Me: “Would you like one of our calendars, sir?”

    Customer: “No thanks. I got one last year!”

    Me: “Well, the dates are different on this one.”

    Customer: “Really?!”

    Technology To Shout About

    | London, UK |

    Me: “Hello sir, I’ve just come to put a microphone on you.”

    Client: “I hate those things. Do I need one? I can project.”

    Me: “You have an audio conference call on this event, so you need to speak into a microphone. Otherwise, people calling in won’t hear anything.”

    Client: “Can’t I just shout?”

    Me: “From London to Mumbai?”

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