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    Bread And Prejudice

    | Ireland | Food & Drink, Language & Words, Religion, Uncategorized

    Customer: “Can I have a ham and cheese sandwich please?”

    Me: “Would you like that on white or brown bread?”

    Customer: “I don’t mind. I’m not prejudiced.”

    Me: “You’re not… prejudiced?”

    Customer: “Not at all, sure the other day I ate some ‘properdoms’!” (That’s how she pronounced papadums – the flat crunchy bread you get in Indian restaurants.) “They were lovely.”

    Me: “Oh good. Now what type of bread would you like?”

    (At this point a woman of another ethnicity that had been served by my co-worker leaves. Suddenly, this customer becomes visibly relieved.)

    Customer: “Give me some good, God-fearing white bread!”

    Bird Brained, Part 7

    | Orlando, FL, USA | Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals, Uncategorized

    (I overhear a group of teenagers talking while looking at the penguin exhibit.)

    Teenager 1: “What exactly is a penguin?”

    Teenager 2: “Are you that stupid? A penguin is a fish!”

    Teenager 2: “No. A penguin is an amphibian. You know, like frogs.”

    Teenager 1: “You know guys I think penguins are mammals, because they got fur. ”

    Me: *addressing everybody at exhibit* “The penguin is a unique bird that can ‘fly’ in the water.”

    Teenager 2: *after looking at his friends in awe* “I still think it’s a fish.”

    Related:
    Early Bird Brained
    Bird Brained
    Bird Brained, Part 2
    Bird Brained, Part 3
    Bird Brained, Part 4
    Bird Brained, Part 5
    Bird Brained, Part 6

    Split Over Musical (Price) Differences

    | Calgary, AB, Canada | Musical Mayhem, Uncategorized

    Customer: “Do you have [popular album]?”

    Me: “Yep. It’s right over here.”

    Customer: “That’s expensive.”

    Me: “That’s pretty average”

    Customer: “I bet [competitor] is cheaper.”

    Me: “I doubt it. We are usually a fair bit cheaper than them.”

    Customer: “I don’t know. I bet they are cheaper.”

    Me: “I don’t think they will be, but they are right upstairs if you want to take a peek and come back.  You will see that we are cheaper.”

    (The customer leaves and comes back 15 minutes later with our competitors bag.)

    Me: “Oh, were they cheaper?”

    Customer: “No, they were a lot more expensive. You should really stop recommending that place.”

    Stop Bean Stupid

    | The Netherlands | Uncategorized

    Customer: “I’d like one cappuccino.”

    Me: “Oh, sorry, we’re out of coffee today.”

    Customer: “That’s okay, I’d only like a cappuccino.”

    Me: “The cappuccino has coffee in it.”

    Customer: “Can’t you just make it without it?”

    Library Staff Are Very Amen-able

    | Tennessee, USA | Books & Reading, Religion, Uncategorized

    Customer: *handing me a book* “Is this the Koran?”

    Me: “No sir, this appears to be a book about Ojibwe singers.”

    Customer: “The lady said it would be on aisle 6B.”

    Me: “It is, but the Koran’s call number is 297. This book is listed under 264.”

    *blank stare*

    Me: “Let me try to help you find it.”

    (Walking to aisle 6B, I notice that the book he grabbed is the first book on the aisle, at eye level.)

    Me: “Sir, did you just walk to aisle 6B and grab the first book you saw?”

    Customer: “I couldn’t find it, so…yes.”

    (He then find’s another book on the shelf.)

    Customer: “Oh here it is! Would this be the best one?”

    (The patron has picked up ‘The Complete Idiot’s Guide to the Koran’.)

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